Fourteen Maids of the Bride!

Manolo says, so the crazy Georgia bride she just up and ran away before the wedding.

A Georgia bride-to-be who vanished just days before her wedding turned up in New Mexico and fabricated a tale of abduction before admitting Saturday that she got cold feet and “needed some time alone,” police said.

Jennifer Wilbanks, 32, was in police custody more than 1,420 miles from her home on what was supposed to be her wedding day Saturday.

“It turns out that Miss Wilbanks basically felt the pressure of this large wedding and could not handle it,” said Randy Belcher, the police chief in Duluth, Ga., the Atlanta suburb where Wilbanks lives with her fiance. He said there would be no criminal charges.

Far be it from the Manolo to be the person to cast the stone at this poor woman, and her crazy fleeing ways, however, this detail it caught the eye of the Manolo.

The wedding was going to be a huge bash. The couple had mailed 600 invitations, and the ceremony was to feature 14 bridesmaids and 14 groomsmen.

Fourteen maids of the bride! This it is madness!

By the comparison, the Princess Diana she only had five maids of the bride. The Jackie O. when she was the Jackie B. and married the JFK, she had only ten of the maids of the bride.

Manolo says, although the Manolo he is usually in favor of the opulence and the luxury, it is nonetheless the rule of the Manolo that if the girl she feels the need to have more than ten maids of the bride–more than the Jackie O. (nee B.) needed to marry the JFK–she should not be getting married.

Perhaps this rule it sounds too harsh, but it has been the experience of the Manolo that for the girls who demand the most super gigantic of the fairytale weddings, the wedding itself frequently becomes more important than the marriage.

This it is not to say that the big wedding it is in itself bad, but rather it is to say that for the bride who demands the perfect day of the wedding, to the point of either inciting the hatred of those around them, or to the point of wanting to runaway and leave the poor parents thinking she has been murdered, something it is wrong.

The wedding day it is to be the day of joy, and its approach should be greeted with the gladness and the earnest longing for its arrival. If the planning of the wedding has become the ordeal to be endured one must step back and reconsider the necessity of the fourteen maids of the brides.

56 Responses to “Fourteen Maids of the Bride!”

  1. Midlife May 3, 2005 at 6:15 am #

    Ha ha Digitalbrownshirt, way to make the best point yet.

  2. Bill the Man May 3, 2005 at 4:46 pm #

    Look. Let’s face it. As much as we guys don’t want to mention it, the plain truth is that she is a 32 year old girl. She cries, she gets weepy, she runs off, she lies to the police because she wants everyone to like her. And what happens? They give her a little white teddy bear in Albuquerque to make her feel better — to calm her, and reassure her that at least Mr. Teddy Bear will still love her.

    Don’t believe me? Go to this link and look at Teddy peeking out from under her afghan:

    http://apnews.myway.com/image/20050430/MISSING_BRIDE.sff_NMJS110_20050430180646.html?date=20050501&docid=D89QJC4O1

    But, you know, lets face it. She’s a girl. It goes with the territory. It wouldn’t work for men because we are held (and hold each other) to a different standard. No one wipes our teary weepy eyes and clucks sympathetically at our pleas for understanding. (thank heavens for that! There is somehing nice about being an adult!)

    Thirty-two year old men facing marriage for the first time, aren’t handed teddy bears by the police to make them feel better when they ditch the bride at the altar. We men get no sympathy when we complain about how our mommy pressured us to do the wedding this way or that way.

    Bottom line: we are guys. And thank God for that! As a guy, promise me: if I ever get that bad, just put a gun to the base of my skull and pull the trigger.

    So what about the guy, her fiancee? Is he nuts for sticking with her? Nah. I don’t think so. His is the classic guy’s role. He has found a wounded bird, a fragile leaf, blowing in the wind, desperately in need of his manly protection to save her from the cold heartless world. She will effectively be his first child. This world is filled with so many, many men like him. And, with his family’s money and some servants, he can take care of his fragile little girl for the rest of her life. He will be her Prince Charming. Every little girl’s dream.

  3. LuceLu May 3, 2005 at 7:13 pm #

    The wedding was definitely overkill. I always like to point out the most ostentatious the wedding the shorter and less spectacular the marriage. Apparently this wedding was so over-the-top the marriage was pre-empted.

    What really weirds me out about it is that she cut her hair! Who does that? Who just lops off their hair and jumps on Greyhound to Albequerque? Sounds like a conspiracy to commit fraud… who cuts their hair off like that? What if she hadn’t run out of money? Then she named that stupid teddy bear. What woman over 16 years old names stuffed animals?

    Acceptable coping mechanisms exist, even for women who run too much.
    Shoes, she should have shopped for shoes…. she could have flown to NY for shoes, then at least she’d still have her hair and her friends would just think she was spunky but had style.

  4. La BellaDonna May 4, 2005 at 8:21 am #

    LuceLu, um … La BellaDonna has the stuffed animal with the name. She has the soft velvety black bat, and its name is “Fluffy.” It is the very nice bat.

    The naming of the stuffed toy does not prevent La BellaDonna from agreeing with you that yes; the more more more emphasis that is placed on the wedding, the shorter the marriage. The more the bride is about the wedding, the less she may be about the groom. It is the good question for the bride to be asked: if she had to get married in front of the justice of the peace, wearing something she already owned, with no one else there, would she still get married? If the answer is not “yes,” she owes it to her fiancé to release him and keep looking until the answer is yes; he deserves the marriage to someone else, for whom the answer, it is yes.

    The cutting of the hair, it has the psychological significance. It is often the substitute for the more serious mutilation of the self, and it is the sign of the serious disturbance. This is not so much the “cutting and dying of the hair to change the identity” like the superspy, but more the chopping off and destroying of the old identity: “That person no longer exists.”

    Bill the Man, he has made the very very astute observations. The Prince Charming, he will have his work cut out for him.

    La BellaDonna has seen the many men, and also the many women, suffering from the Messiah Complex, dedicated to saving and protecting the spouse/child. It is the “marriage” that functions, after its own fashion, but only as long as neither party changes his or her role. Then it is the debacle.

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