The Plague!

By Manolo the Shoeblogger

Manolo says, Ayyyyyyy! The symptoms they are presenting…

First the rash of the Scandanavian Abba-wanna-be’s…

…then the itchy Austrian oompah-rockers…

…followed by the painful Eastern European gypsy-accordian-rock ensembles…

…next the Hungarians, always, and inexplicably, the Hungarians…

And finally, the act that wowed them in Minsk!

Manolo says, this it can only mean one thing!

Live from Kiev! It is the loathsome pestilence known as the Eurovision Song Contest!


20 Responses to “The Plague!”

  1. The Scarlett Says:

    Don’t tell me, the Hungarians have cloned Michael Flatley! And just when you thought you had seen the last of Riverdance. Ayyyyy!

  2. Katie Says:

    Oh, Manolo!!! I am loving you so much for posting these extraordinary pictures from the Eurovision contest! No one in the States has ever heard of it, but I am so glad to see some recognition for one of the most hideous and painful yet hilarious and adored traditions (aside from the wearing of the Liederhosen) ever to come out of Europe.

    The Manolo, he could take the Eurovision by storm!!!

  3. Christie Says:

    Are you kidding me?
    I thought it was one of those American Idol ensemble sing-a-longs about how fabulous it is to drive a Ford around the world.

  4. Carol Says:

    Is that last one Rochelle, Rochelle?

  5. daleth Says:

    When I see those Austrians, I hear voices…

    “I’m a little bit country”

    “I’m a little bit OomPaPa!”

  6. The Scarlett Says:

    Carol, you mean the story of a young girl’s erotic journey from Milan to Minsk? Er … I think those guys are gay, not that there is anything wrong with that. And, are those puffy shirts?

  7. CrankyBiscuit Says:

    Okay, am I crazy, or do the Hungarians bear an unfortunate resemblance to the Kryptonians from Superman II?

  8. Manolo the Shoeblogger Says:

    “Okay, am I crazy, or do the Hungarians bear an unfortunate resemblance to the Kryptonians from Superman II? ”

    Manolo says, roll the mouse over the picture of the Hungarians.

  9. Roy Says:

    but dirndls are so cute!

    ok, I admit it, I have a very sick fetish

    I will go crawl back into my hole

  10. vanessa_parody Says:

    Ahh, but to be truly and appreciatively European, you mustn’t call it the “Eurovision Song Contest”, as that smacks of the UK, and the fact we don’t take it at all seriously, in no small part due to Mr T Wogan and his hilarious and irreverent commentary.

    No, you must embrace the way of the Scandinavians, who truly love it, and expect their representatives to have a long and successful music career after eahc and every “Null Points” debacle– you must refer to it as the much more glamorous “Melodi Grand Prix”, a lovely title that brings together a mish-mash of Euro languages AND at the same time suggests the car-crash TV event it will be, in one handy, melodic title…

  11. Emma Says:

    The Eurovision is a bizarro world glamour show, truly beyond fashion as we know it. Nothing is too tacky, nothing is ever labelled tasteless. No colours too bright, no hairdo too extravagant. Think dragqueen, but take it down a notch and add some yodeling or a strange string instrument. Like Vegas, only with Albanian lyrics.

  12. Sleepy Says:

    I must thank the Manolo for not mentioning the country that the singers in the first pic represent, instead simply referring to them as Scandinavians.

  13. Annalucia Says:

    The Annalucia rather admires the lady from Minsk. If the Belarusians ever shed their government of the old-style Communists she would make a very good model for the East European Statue of Liberty (though she would have to lose the microphone). And the Scarlett should not read too much into the puffy, frilly shirts of the back-up boys; at one time this was the festive dress of the Eastern European male, along with the beribboned hats and the embroidered trousers. It does not mean that they would be receptive to the charms of the Andrew Sullivan.

    The Hungarians, however, are truly alarming. Perhaps this is due to the strain of speaking a language of the Finno-Ugric variety.

  14. Megan Says:

    any of them sing “My Lovely Horse?”

  15. Manolo the Shoeblogger Says:

    Ha! The Megan she has made the hilarious and obscure Father Ted reference! One that has made the Manolo laugh out loud!

  16. Luella Says:

    ooooo the homeboys! as pathetic as it seems Europeans (and semi-europeans for that matter) take lots of pride in this contest … it’s BIG deal, yo!

  17. jenn Says:

    oh manolo, the eurovision, it is the utmost humiliation in verse. i saw a documentary on the eurovision, why i watched it in it’s entirety i don’t know, but it followed the 2001 winners tanel padar and dave benton in the post-win aftermath in their lonely and sad little estonian town. the tanel, he is the skinny blond ballerina and the dave he is the estonian ruben studdard and the pairing of these two i will never understand.

  18. Megan Says:

    YAY! I knew the Manolo wouldn’t let me down. Father Ted and shoes – what a great combination.

  19. 2Dave Says:

    I must admit to finding the oompah girl somewhat fetching. She should put on a pretty dress, maybe brush her hair a little, and lose the undead corpse of Christopher Reeve.

  20. Elvira Says:

    The Elvira, she had the minor surgery last week and is now laughing so hard she must check the good doctor’s stitches to make sure they are still in place.

    Does anyone else think that the Austrian oompah band resembles the Donny and Marie of the Osmond multitude? The Elvira, she thinks the resemblance, it is frightening. Truly frightening.

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