Careful, Joan Rivers, Don’t Tear the Stitch

Manolo says, on the face lift.

15 Responses to “Careful, Joan Rivers, Don’t Tear the Stitch”

  1. JP September 29, 2005 at 12:50 am #

    Honestly, she is getting closer to Hairless Smashed-In Persian Cat Face every day. Gah.

  2. desertwind September 29, 2005 at 3:45 am #

    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0053459/

  3. Imelda Blahnik September 29, 2005 at 8:08 am #

    One or two more facelifts and those eyes without a face will be vertical. Gah indeed!

  4. Johnnycake September 29, 2005 at 9:20 am #

    Arrest that woman! The Scream, the painting it is recovered!

  5. Annalucia September 29, 2005 at 10:26 am #

    Thank you, desertwind, for the link. It made the Annalucia laugh; in fact it is the only thing that prevented her from clapping her hands over her eyes and running away screaming from the photo.

  6. The Scarlett September 29, 2005 at 11:41 am #

    Don’t you get the sense that there is some elaborate pully system pulling her face back and that the cleavage is painted in daily?

  7. zippy September 29, 2005 at 1:53 pm #

    Now, now; The Zippy always swings a hammer dressed like the Joan. The Zipsters’ face is as it should be; the Zip has no need for the plastic touch to feel real.

  8. Ryno September 29, 2005 at 3:41 pm #

    As usual, many have let the face and the cleavage distract them from what is really important. Those slick pants, you will notice, are designed to instantly shed sawdust and other construction debris.

  9. Das Boots September 29, 2005 at 6:40 pm #

    Das Boots thinks that if you socialize too much with the Jocelyn Wildenstein, you begin to take on the scary characteristics.

  10. Fred the Fourth September 29, 2005 at 6:52 pm #

    Back in the day…(and never mind the cleavage or other fashion faux pas) …if I saw a sight like that on *my* site, she’d soon be wearing gloves, a hardhat, a dust mask, and set to work tossing tag-ends of 2x4s into the dumpster. It’s clearly the limit of her utility in the carlentry biz. Where’d she learn to hold a hammer? Harvard, maybe?

    Also, the hardhat and dust mask would help save *my* eyes.

  11. Fred the Fourth September 29, 2005 at 6:55 pm #

    “carpentry”, not “carlentry”.
    (Lessee…”carlentry”: the class-2 felony consisting of renting cars under the “Alamo” banner. Yeah, that works for me….)

  12. Lance de Boyle September 29, 2005 at 8:06 pm #

    Not to worry. The plastic visage of the Joan Rivers is secured with arc welding. I panic at the thought of sudden droppage of the buttocks lift. A good squeeze will do it. And then what? The end of civilization as we know it.

  13. Esther September 30, 2005 at 5:31 pm #

    She frightens me so much, that I to go to the vending machine, and partake of the Twix bar.

    Like she’s ever picked up a hammer in her life, except maybe to help during the nose jobs.

  14. Mindy September 30, 2005 at 10:24 pm #

    Careful–with that many facelifts your jaw will fly open every time you sit down.

  15. Kniteratti October 5, 2005 at 12:55 am #

    Anyone call for a useless venom spewing celebrity hag? Wearing leather pants for a charity house building photo op? I’m sorry…..it’s just so hard to live a real life and have people like this out there somewhere using up my oxygen….things are getting blurry, no wait! that’s just the lens filter, the Joan 200XX as it’s called in the trades….