Help the Hoff

Manolo says, the magnificent Hasselhoff he is looking for the new chick!

Former Baywatch star David Hasselhoff is refusing to allow his recent divorce get him down – he already has plans to find a new “chick”.

Hasselhoff divorced from his wife of 16 years, Pamela Bach, last month.

But now the 54-year-old is searching for his ideal partner, and she must be clever.

He says, “I’m coming to England in September and I want to find myself a beautiful girlfriend. But I don’t want some dumb blonde. I’d like a woman who’s really intelligent.

“I saw this girl recently who must have stepped out of the office during her lunch break and was wearing work clothes and glasses, and I thought to myself, ‘That’s what I want, a chick who’s career-orientated.'”

Clever? Career oriented?

The Manolo has the suggestion….

Future Mrs. Hoff?

Perhaps the Manolo’s many readers can leave the better suggestions for the future Mrs. Hasselhoff in the comments below.

22 Responses to “Help the Hoff”

  1. Chelsea August 30, 2006 at 8:42 am #

    Theresa Russell?

  2. Eric3000 August 30, 2006 at 11:31 am #

    What the Hoff wants is a woman who LOOKS intelligent. All this takes is the pair of glasses and the putting of the hair up in the bun. Even the Tara Reid can pull this off.

  3. Despina August 30, 2006 at 11:46 am #

    I smell a reality show!!!

  4. Miss Janey August 30, 2006 at 12:31 pm #

    The Hoff needs someone who’s an all ‘round entertainer like himself- someone who acts, sings, even shimmies a little. Someone slightly younger, cuz men need that. I nominate Cher. She’s definitely clever, and career-oriented and understands the vagaries of a life in show biz.

    Now if he’s seeking to meet someone across the pond… How ‘bout Sarah Ferguson?

  5. Sarah in Israel August 30, 2006 at 1:10 pm #

    The Hoff seeks a paradox.

    A clever woman would not date a man who has been divorced for only one month.

  6. Victor August 30, 2006 at 2:17 pm #

    Heidi Fleiss. She started and ran her own business, which should qualify her as “career oriented.”

  7. furlagirl August 30, 2006 at 4:14 pm #

    off topic

    and in 2001, two Jordanian soldiers were evacuated home with injured penises after attempting sexual intercourse with goats.

    http://www.theage.com.au/news/world/un-acts-to-stamp-out-sex-abuse-by-staff-in-east-timor/2006/08/29/1156816899264.html

  8. Scott August 30, 2006 at 7:32 pm #

    Funny you should ask instead of scrolling down to the previous blog entry. Why not match the magnificent Hasselhof with the miraculously svelte Katie Couric? Clearly she’s a career oriented woman with a certain amount of cleverness. Maybe whoever dropped the extra pounds with help of photoshop could add work clothes and a pair of bookish glasses. No doubt she’d make a lovely addition/prop to one of his world famous music videos.

  9. AJ August 30, 2006 at 9:00 pm #

    But what girl could resist this?

    http://video.google.fr/videoplay?docid=-3382491587979249836&q=type%3Amusic_video

  10. Jen August 30, 2006 at 11:06 pm #

    eeew.

    Who would date hoff?

    eeeew.

  11. raincoaster August 31, 2006 at 3:52 am #

    Lucy Gao. The girl’s got a built-in publicity machine, and she’s about to appear on Spanish Big Brother, despite apparently not speaking any Spanish. Wouldn’t it be nice if two Internet legends got together?

  12. eowyn_2 August 31, 2006 at 10:38 am #

    Hoff wants a clever woman? Clever women don’t appreciate being called “chick”. They also know about waxing. And they aren’t impressed by a lush. I think his search will be fruitless.

  13. rubyg August 31, 2006 at 11:31 am #

    eowyn just expressed what i thought after reading your entry. exactly, no clever/intelligent woman would appreciate being called “chick”!

    mr. hoff, do wake up!

  14. Chris August 31, 2006 at 12:41 pm #

    There are other ways to help The Hoff. Go to GetHasselhofftoNumber1.com and commit to helping The Hoff reach the #1 spot on the UK charts.
    http://www.gethasselhofftonumber1.com/

  15. Mondrianyone August 31, 2006 at 12:55 pm #

    Condoleezza Rice. Because the world needs at least one person named “Condoleezza Hasselhoff.” But just one.

  16. xoconostle August 31, 2006 at 4:45 pm #

    Is Sylvester Stallone’s mama still available? They could wear bad headbands and obvious bronzing foam together while jogging to the Pacific Pallisades Botox clinic.

  17. Chairman of the Bored September 1, 2006 at 10:22 pm #

    I have recently found out that David Hasselhoff is the King of Das Germans. I am still trying to corroborate that allegation.
    As for finding a chick, why not wear the egghead hat shown above?
    If that doesnt work, perhaps he can receive the gratification he so richly deserves by placing the following at select locations: http://uncyclopedia.org/images/thumb/0/0b/Hoff_soap.jpg/180px-Hoff_soap.jpg

  18. toad September 2, 2006 at 12:37 am #

    Hmmm, a corrolary on the Groucho Marx paradox, ” I wouldn’t join a club that would have me.”
    Sharon Stone, she’s free.

  19. Cathy September 4, 2006 at 5:44 pm #

    Perhaps, if he wants an intelligent woman, he should stop referring to women as “chicks.”

  20. Miachelle September 10, 2006 at 10:39 am #

    Cathy beat me to it. That was my thought. Step one, David. Women are not chicks. Chicks come from chickens. Nowhere else.

  21. splendidcakes April 15, 2007 at 3:26 pm #

    The answer is obvious, Velma from Scooby-Doo!!

Trackbacks/Pingbacks:

  1. The Manolo sez: help The Hoff « raincoaster - August 31, 2006

    […] Blogroll, Celebrity, Dating, Singles, Fans, Lush Life) From, obviously, The Manolo. Seems The Hoff is looking for a lovely lady to swank with him through the sa […]