Manolo’s Shoe Blog

Manolo says, now that the Manolo blogs have grown to include five blogs in total, with two more in the offing, the Manolo has decided to do the Friday roundups, so that you may read what you may have perhaps been missing.

And so here is the best from each of the Manolo’s bloggers…

Plumcake

I want to wake up at noon the next morning and sit in the dark eating greasy tacos and watching that scene in Pride and Prejudice where Colin Firth’s Mr. Darcy jumps into and subsequently comes out of the water over and over again until we faint from sheer Regency-era hotness with it only to regain conciousness three hours later and start the whole thing over again.

Mr. Henry…

This sort of artificial food radius is all perfectly fine if you find yourself residing in central California surrounded by the premier fruit and vegetable fields in America. But what about the rest of us?

Francesca…

While I notice that, at first glance, a few of the overweight characters are stereotypically written as “bumbling” or “jovial,” on the whole the overweight good guys blend seamlessly into the good-guy group.

Never teh Bride…

So, let me get this straight. I’m to bring a present to the shower and then send a gift on ahead before the wedding, and I’m supposed to “subsidize the honeymoon?”

Izzy Gallant…

There’s a lot of buzz about whether America is willing to elect a black president, but should we be willing to elect a president who wears black suits?

Manolo says, here is the Manolo’s latest column for the Express of the Washington Post.

Dear Manolo,

I’ve seeing a lot of young women wearing short-short sundresses, big-big sunglasses, and heavy boots. What do you think of this look?

Maya

Manolo says, the Manolo’s friend is referring to the I-am-going-to-Promises-right-after-my-next-arrest look, made current by the young but famous slatterns of the popular gossip press.

Naturally, to achieve the full effect you must be wearing no foundation garments below, and you must have in the one hand the designer “It” bag, and in the other the jumbo soy latte frappuccino with extra vodka.

Of course, anything worn by the troubled starlets becomes the mania among the impressionable young women and those who emulate them, which in Los Angeles includes the 51-year-old ex-wives of Hollywood producers.

The Manolo says, do not be these women. Do not imitate the styles of these young flibberty-jibbets. Be your own style icon.

Look here is the Kaffir from the Maxstudio, the golden strappy sandal that would make the average Hollywood hotty spill her Starbucks in envy.

Manolo says, as the Croc empire of evil attempts to impose its hegemonisitic desires upon the citizens of the world, the the tiny-but-valiant anti-Croc resistance struggles under the oppressive rubber heel fighting for all that is stylish and holy. Look, here is one of the Manolo’s comrades-in-arms, the Marcelle D’Argy Smith fighting the good fight in the Daily Mail.

If there is one thing, in my view, which is guaranteed to drive a woman screaming in the other direction, it is the sight of a man who should know better sporting a luridly technicolour pair of shoes which would look far more suitable on a four-year-old girl.

The damn things look like clumsy rubbery clogs with large perforations.

They’re called Crocs because they resemble a reptile’s snout.

Seductive, eh? And yet six million pairs have been sold around the world already. We are drowning in Crocs.

You may understand the quirky nature of Mr Nicholson - but what about the other ten million pairs of Crocs they’re projected to sell this year? Not all of those people can be ramblers, fisherman and ageing beach bums, surely?

I was just listening to Ella Fitzgerald singing Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered and sighing at the line “I’ll worship the trousers that cling to him”. I then tried to imagine the trousers of a man I loved, teamed with orange or bright-blue Croc shoes.

Go on. You try it. Torture yourself at the thought of the man in your life succumbing to this massive manipulation marketing-gonemad Crocs trend. There’s no telling with an Englishman: he might even wear brown socks with his orange Crocs. You’ll leave him,

Crocs of course. No woman could be expected to live with that.

[…]

Perhaps it’s because wearing them makes them feel about 12 again - you know, when they went on that shrimping holiday to Devon and wore those foul beige jelly sandals.

Now, hey presto, with a mortgage and two kids, they can spend £30 and feel as though they are the coolest cats in town all over again.

Yes, the marketeers have done their work. “They’re comfortable; they’re cheap,” they bleat. May they rot in Croc hell. In fact, I find the thought of a middle-aged man wearing them so repulsive that I’m almost prepared to march on this one.

Hell is too good for the likes of the Crocs manufacturers, Comrade D’Argy Smith, too good, indeed.

Manolo asked, whose shoes?

Manolo answers, the Barbara Walters!

Congratulations to the Manolo’s internet friend, the super fantastic Deja Pseu for being the first to correctly identify the owner of these shoes.

Manolo says, with the happy arrival this week of the Manolo’s new blog, Manolo for the Big Girl, and with the quiet promise of near-future arrival the new Manolo-based celebrity blog, Ayyyy!, you will have noticed that the online world of the Manolo is in the period of expansion.

Indeed, it should be obvious to all that the Manolo is in the process of building the small network of the high-quality, writer-driven fashion and lifestyle blogs.

The Manolo hopes you will also have noticed that all of the people who blog for the Manolo are exceptionally good writers, people who have interesting things to say, and say them with humor and confidence. This is by design, as the Manolo believes it is the quality of his writers that distinguishes his network from others on the internet.

And so now the Manolo is again seeking two bloggers who have the unique and entertaining authorial voices for his next project, Teeny Manolo, the Manolo’s version of the Mommy Blog.

If you have the strong interest in children’s clothing and accessories, celebrity babies, and parenting issues, and if you have the strong writing ability, and the unusual and original perspective, please send the Manolo the email outlining for him your qualifications. Be sure to include the brief samples of your writings and/or links to your bloggings.

As the Manolo hopes to start this blog in the third week of August (just in time for the back-to-school season), please try to send your application by August 10th.

Finally, the Manolo notes that this it is the paid position. Not well paid, nor anywhere near the full time, but there is the potential to perhaps make more, and the exposure may be beneficial to the freelance writer.

Manolo asks, whose shoes?

Manolo says, below is the reason why you do not purchase the cheap Chinese-made flip-flops from from the Wal-Mart.

Hi all! For those of you who don’t know, I used to work at Walmart for a short time, but quit

Before I quit though I did buy a pair of cheepie flip flops to wear over a weekend trip to the beach, Long Boat Key April 20th to be exact.

I actually got the stupid shoes in Aprill with a picture in mind then in June I wore them a few times.

Well, after wearing them my feet would be red and sort of tingly, but I figured that it was just because it was first flip flops of the year so my feet need to get used to them. Blabity blabity… Well I have now had what appears to be a chemical burn for 11 days, (As of July 3rd) I really thought it would just go away on it’s own. It is absolutely not going away very well at all…this started on

June 22nd 2007 and has just gotten worse basically. I have only worn those shoes 15 minutes here, half an hour there, hour there…and so on, NOT enough time to burn my feet like this!

Please, go now and look at what the cheap shoes can do to your feets, but first allow the Manolo to warn you that the pictures are not pleasant.

Let this be the cautionary tale about the perils of the cheap shoes.

P.S. Many thanks to the Manolo’s internet friends the Rachel and the Lucia who sent the Manolo the link.

Manolo says, here for your Tuesday morning viewing pleasure is something pink, and flirty, and summery from the Hollywould.

Manolo says, it is Tuesday, time to see what the Manolo is…

Reading…

Listening to…

Watching…

“But, Manolo,” asked the friend of the Manolo, “you do not seem like the sort of person who would enjoy this giant, stupid,Transformers robot-fighting movie.”

“Yes, it is true,” answered the Manolo, “the Manolo is not the intended audience. But…there it is. He saw it. He went at the behest of some twelve-year-old friends of his, who assured him that this movie ‘rocked’.”

“So, did you at least enjoy this movie?”

“Yes. Very much so. It was loud and dumb, and more than moderately ridiculous, and yet for all of that, if one could disengage the thinking parts, it was also rousing and funny and entertaining, in its lowest common denominator way.”

“Would you say it ‘rocked’?”

“Yes, ‘rocked’. That is the best description. But then, the Manolo expected this , as he learned long ago to trust the opinions of the twelve-year old boys and girls. Thirteen-year olds, no. They are untrustworthy. But the twelve-year-olds, they know and will tell you truthfully.”