Manolo says, here is the best of the week from the Manolosphere.

Never teh Bride…

Today is my birthday, and this is how I feel inside…

Mr. Henry…

Mr. Henry finds endless fascination in the functioning idiot, the overachiever, the C-student billionaire, the clueless success story. (Is not President Bush the shining example of this quintessential American dream, namely, that ANYBODY can get ahead here in the land of opportunity?) Such stories give him more than hope; they form the backbone of his long-term financial plans.

Izzy Gallant…

Izzy thinks that Lagerfeld needs a hug.

Plumcake…

I mean, whatever happened to good old-fashioned WASP repression? It’s what’s made this country great. My family hasn’t shown a single human emotion since 1783 and look how I turned out.

Francesca…

Perhaps you are answering “Of course it is. It is the natural color which God gave me in His wisdom.” To which Francesca replies: Yes, and perhaps the Good Lord wishes you to Work With Him to perfect your hair.

Twistie…

All too often, we are taught to treat food as an enemy to be conquored, but in reality it’s a friend to be respected and treated well.

Raincoaster…

Now, I’m just sayin’ … it’s a strange coincidence, perhaps nothing more than a strange coincidence, but that article came out on a Friday morning, and by the following Monday no fewer than like, half the celebrities in the world gave birth.

Glinda…

I keep reminding myself, photo-shoot, things are allowed to be, uh, different. She’s depressed about her grades or something, that’s all!

Spirit Fingers…

If it’s serious about being the next superpower China should be conquering other world famous landmarks: Shaolin monks doing flying kicks and shooting energy balls from the Statue of Liberty,drag rickshaw racing over the Sydney Harbour Bridge, mahjong tournaments on the top deck of the Eiffel Tower…

Manolo says, Glinda at the Teeny Manolo reads the Us Weekly Magazine so that we do not have to.

E-list “celebrity” Trista Sutter (the Bachelorette, just to remind anyone who may have watched the show) is on a mission to lose weight. You see, only three months ago, she became a mother. But according to her, “I’m definitely not pleased when I look in the mirror.” Trista, weighing in at a whopping 116 pounds and size four, wants to lose that pesky baby weight, stat!

In an interview with US Magazine, Trista reveals how she especially dislikes

my belly. It has a layer of fat, which, of course, your body has to put on, but it’s blubbery and I hate it. I want to be able to go bathing suit shopping for a vacation and not feel totally disgusted… I just don’t feel good in a lot of my clothes.

Trista, Trista. Can I sit down with you for a second? We need to have a conversation. Go ahead and get comfy, because this might take a while.

Naturally, Glinda attempts to set her straight.

Meanwhile, at the Manolo for the Big Girl, Plumcake takes the more practical approach.

Manolo says, the Manolo has been opposed to these ridiculous Reef Sandals with the flask in the sole since he first saw them. But now, he has more substantive reasons to dislike them, they can kill you.

Even as federal authorities issued an alert warning U.S. law enforcement officers that terrorists are continuing to conceal explosive devices in thick soled shoes, a regional law enforcement agency followed up Thursday with a warning that one manufacturer’s beach sandal can hold liquid explosives and a sharp implement in its heel,, according to a bulletin issued originally last spring and reissued yesterday the “Dram Sandal” by Reef, is capable of holding approximately 2-3 ounces of liquid in a hidden compartment, located in the heel of each sandal. The Dram Sandal became available March 1, 2007, and can be purchased online and at most shoe stores, the bulletin stated.

“The Reef Company, which is a designer and distributor of casual apparel and footwear, has developed several sandals with bottle openers concealed in the heel of the sandal” the bulletin reads. “The most recent line of Reef Sandals is the Dram Sandal. The Dram Sandal contains a flask embedded into the sole of the sandal and is marketed as a ‘Polyurethane encapsulated canteen in heel with screw cap.’ In addition to the hidden plastic canteen, the sandal comes complete with a mini funnel, church key/bottle opener and a visual gauge embedded in the sole to show how much liquid is remaining in the hidden compartment. The hidden compartment in the Dram Sandal, which was primarily made for storing beverages, could intentionally or unwittingly be used to store and transport liquid explosives.”

Now if we can only find reasons to keep the Crocs off the airplanes.

P.S. From the Manolo’s internet friends at Hot Air

Manolo says, the Manolo has previously mentioned the shoes of the young designer Nicole Brundage, but he must again say how impressed he is with her work.

But, judge for yourself, here are two examples from her new Fall-Winter 2008 Collection, available for viewing at her website.

Here is the Elenoire from the Nicole Brundage. The Manolo loves this combination of the natural leather with the peep toe.

And this shoe above is the Margot, which has the exceedingly sexy ankle strap.

All of this is yet more evidence that Nicole Brundage is the young person to be watched.

Manolo says, “The wolf also shall dwell with the lamb, and the leopard shall lie down with the kid; and the zebra and the dolphin together; and a little child shall lead them.”

Manolo says, here is the Manolo’s latest column for the Express of the Washington Post.

Dear Manolo,

The library in the little Maine town where I live will soon have a gala fundraising ball. I have secured a very nice dark red gown for the affair, but I’m afraid my L.L. Bean gumboots just don’t go. Can you recommend a pair of shoes that will demonstrate what a shoe can be?

Amber

Manolo says, this question, although phrased humorously, points out the much more serious problem, how does one maintain super fantasticness while living in the small town? This is doubly true now that we have arrived in the era of complete casualness, when we can regularly meet with our bankers, accountants, and lawyers in their Casual Friday cut-offs and muscle shirts.

“Oh, this tattoo of copulating unicorns? I got it when I spent the summer after law school working as a carny.”

“Well, it looks good on you, Jane.”

So, what must one do?

Fight the power!

Just because one lives in coastal Maine, or rural Kansas, it does not mean that one cannot dress up to the nines when presented with the slightest excuse.

Church social? The Manolo recommends Chanel!

County fair? Burberry!

Town council zoning meeting? Balenciaga!

And for the library ball? The Manolo recommends the Romancemid from Stuart Weitzman, in black or red.

Manolo says, here from the New York Post is the amusing review of the Evil One’s movie, Lagerfeld Confidential.

‘THE few people I know who knew me as a child say I was like a male Shirley Temple – rather unbearable and spoiled,” muses designer Karl Lagerfeld in “Lagerfeld Confidential,” the Rodolphe Marconi documentary that makes its American premiere at Film Forum on Wednesday.

The film is a compilation of behind-the-scenes footage from Chanel and Lagerfeld’s eponymous line, as well as no-holds-barred interviews with the designer and vignettes from Lagerfeld’s childhood. It offers viewers an unprecedented level of access to Lagerfeld’s private life.

In the documentary, his home – stashed to the rafters with books, magazines, iPods, Chrome Hearts jewelry and dozens of rails of black clothes – is on open display. So are the private moments, like Karl walking around in his bathrobe and Karl without his sunglasses.

Beware, the Devil’s Eyes!

Manolo says, ayyyy! Travolta and Efron, the Fakers Come to Town!

Manolo says, the Manolo’s internet friend Charlotte has reminded the Manolo that today is St. Crispin’s Day, the feast day for the twin saints Crispin and Crispian, two of the most important of the patron saints of the cobbler.

What many of the Manolo’s friends may not know is that few occupations have as many patron saints as that of the shoemakers. Indeed, the distinction of patron may be applied to several dozen holy figures of the past ( the partial list of which may be seen at this website), including such luminaries as Catherine of Alexandria, Mary Magdalene, Homobonus, and Gangolfo.

Also not well known, is that most of these tutelary saints began life as aristocrats who later humbled themselves in the service of God, producing through the honest labor of their hands beautiful shoes for the those who had none. This is why shoemaking has historically been called the “Noble or Gentle Craft“, because its patrons saints were usually nobility.

But none of this is news to those few who have read the Manolo’s Consolation of the Shoes, which describes in detail the period in the young Manolo’s life when he was ardently devoted to the cults of many of these noble saints.

And now, in secular celebration of this holy day, the Manolo gives you that most appropriate of poems, The Shoemakers, by John Greenleaf Whittier.

(more…)

Manolo says, remember these beautiful and unusual Prada Ombre shoes from last season, with the sfumato gradient effect?

It seems that Stuart Weitzman does…

In the coming months you will undoubtedly see more modestly priced shoes with this same look.

Manolo asked, whose shoes?

Manolo answers, it is the Katie Holmes!

Congratulations to the Cat, who has once again been the first to correctly identify whose shoes.

After looking at many, many pictures of the Katie Holmes, that Manolo has to say that he has rarely seen any person more ill at ease in front of the camera.

Manolo says, the words “Christian Louboutin Over-the-Knee Boots” shout SEXY, but here you see Mariah Carey and Jennifer Lopez demonstrating that there is the fine line between sexy and ridiculous. Mimi simply looks ready to do the Pretty Woman stroll on Hollywood Blvd.

As for the J-Lo, all the Manolo could think about was this…

Which is clearly not what Christian Louboutin had in mind.