Clergerie for the Monday

Manolo says, it is only Monday afternoon and, ayyyyy, already you have experienced the major wardrobe malfunction, one that occurred at the moment of maximum inconvenience: while you were presenting your latest expense projections to Mz. Gargglemole, Regional Overlord of Personnel Branding and Scarification, and her phalanx of toadies.

You had just bent over to adjust the Powerpoint projector (which was at that moment displaying your FY 2008-09 estimations for brazier, branding iron, and pincer repairs) when your Spanx unexpectedly, audibly, and explosively, decompressed.

*POP*

Like the cork out of the champagne bottle.

Your face turned red, your drawers sagged, your bulges bulged, and, worst of all, Trent Garfunkel, your hated office nemesis, snickered.

Lucky for you, Mz. Gargglemole, herself the woman of size, glared the pipsqueaky Trent into gnat-like insignificance, and announced the ten minute recess, which you spent in the washroom working feverishly with electricians tape and the Ace bandage.

The rest of your presentation went magnificently, and afterward, Ms. Gargglemole pulled you aside, complimented you on your composure, and recommended, “just between us big girls”, the boutique where one may purchase the brand of heavy-duty foundation garments manufactured in Soviet Russia.

So, it all worked out for the best in the end, even if you are still somewhat traumatized, and now you have retreated to your desk to look at the shoes so as to calm your jangly nerves.

Last week, the Manolo recommended the Clergerie shoes, and The Thoughtful Dresser blog is always speaking of them.

What this? Unusual and beautiful demi-wedge-heel ankle booties!

Trendy by Robert Clergerie    Manolo Likes!  Click!

16 Responses to “Clergerie for the Monday”

  1. Miss Janey July 14, 2008 at 6:24 pm #

    Oh, Senor Manolo, you continue to top yourself each week.

  2. raincoaster July 15, 2008 at 12:15 am #

    Those are the shoes that the secretly magical nanny wears, to let you know she’s not any ordinary old nanny.

  3. Matthew Kimel July 15, 2008 at 2:06 am #

    Raincoaster,

    I cannot stop laughing from your comment, seriously lol

  4. Laura July 15, 2008 at 11:09 am #

    Let me tell you, I am not a fan of Clergie’s idea of a heel….

  5. TobyWollin July 15, 2008 at 3:15 pm #

    Ah, but Manolo – those of us who need the extra-strength help know that electrician’s tape(the black plastic sort) tends to stretch and can abandon one’s hips at the most inappropriate moment. Better to invest in duct tape(aka ‘gaffer’s tape’), which is known to hold up everything including theatrical lighting instruments on cast iron pipes two stories over the stage. Yes, taking it off later can be traumatic, but to save one’s presentation – ah….insurance like that is priceless.

  6. Noga July 15, 2008 at 4:03 pm #

    I wonder if the perpetually inventive and versatile Red Green ever imagined such a use for his duct tape?

    “When he works on his Handyman projects, Red is not stupid, he’s just sort of lazy, impatient, and prone to subsitute sub-standard items (such as usiing duct tape instead of nails, screws, bolts, glass, glue, rivets, solder, or welding) so Red’s projects are always less than reliable and more than butt ugly. “

  7. Mango July 15, 2008 at 4:36 pm #

    Oh no, gaffer’s tape is not the same as duct tape. Duct tape, as it is meant to be permanant, will leave a sticky residue on one’s walls, cables, and unmentionables. Gaff tape, as it is meant to be temporary, will not. It may, however, release its hold on one’s bulges at an unfortunate time, causing one to flash one’s elderly algebra teacher. Not that one would know.

  8. cybill July 15, 2008 at 7:51 pm #

    Well I need those shoes, and the name of the secret Russian factory!

  9. Robyn Marie July 15, 2008 at 8:03 pm #

    So it’s not true love for me, the heel/wedge thing is more strange than unique in my opinion. It just seems like modern and classic are competing too much.

  10. Marie July 15, 2008 at 9:49 pm #

    Always a fan of the Manolo’s sublime prose style, I am in awe of the heights that he has reached with “Mz. Gargglemole, Regional Overlord of Personnel Branding and Scarification, and her phalanx of toadies.” Dickens could not do better!

  11. Nat July 16, 2008 at 3:00 pm #

    Gorgeous pair of boots!

  12. belle July 16, 2008 at 7:07 pm #

    Love the post, hate the shoes.

  13. ryder July 19, 2008 at 5:54 am #

    actually i love this shoes, they remind me on UK’s industrial era. i just love when fashion returns into past to give a homage to hard working people. just love it!

  14. Rural Juror July 19, 2008 at 2:35 pm #

    I would like to thank the Manolo for the wonderful story and to recommend, if he has has not already done so, to watch “The Extras” finale episode as it includes another amusing garment misfunction.

  15. Rural Juror July 19, 2008 at 2:42 pm #

    Make that MALfunction. Darn you, Xanax.

  16. Nora July 20, 2008 at 2:38 am #

    ugliest shoes I’ve seen in a while. funny post though.