Jean Paul Gaultier For the Monday

Manolo says, it is Monday of the final week before the Day of Labor, and you now feel as if your entire summer has been wasted.

Oh, you had such big plans in May. Not only were you going to do your big week-long trip to the lake, where the kids would get enough sunburn and poison ivy to last the winter, but you had also planned to refinish the deck, resod the backyard, plant some new trees, clean out and organize the garage, begin remodeling the downstairs bathroom, and repave the driveway.

Of the course, none of this happened.

Well, at the least, Gary did manage to install the new mailbox, one of those heavy-duty steel models, guaranteed to break the arm of anyone who hits it with the baseball bat while hanging out of the window of the speeding Camero. (Gary seemed positively gleeful about this prospect. “I want to go get the paper one morning and find body parts,” he said as he made his way, shovel in hand, through the narrow path in the garage, “a couple of fingers, or maybe a whole arm.” In his defense, this is the fourth mailbox in as many years.)

Suburban home ownership, ugh. It make you want to give it all up and move into the little pied-à-terre in the city, something directly upstairs from the quaint French bakery.

Of the course, this dream of yours will never happen. Where would Gary park the ski boat?

What you need now is something to spice up the mundanity of your existence. Look, here are the very urban, slightly scary, extremely expensive boots from Jean Paul Gaultier.

Boots from Jean Paul Gaultier   Manolo Likes! Click!

If this does not make you forget the unfortunate color scheme of the downstairs bathroom, nothing will.

18 Responses to “Jean Paul Gaultier For the Monday”

  1. dangster August 24, 2009 at 2:43 pm #

    The first thing that came to mind when I saw these boots was Edward Scissorhands.

  2. Lisa August 24, 2009 at 3:05 pm #

    Gary and the mailbox!!! I’m so glad it’s not just writers and academics like me who feel like they waste the summer! Kudos to you, Manolo, for capturing my Monday feeling yet again. Though I love me some JPG, I am not crazy about these. Though I would not turn them down if somebody bought them for me!

  3. bristlesage August 24, 2009 at 5:21 pm #

    Sadly, it is not the Monday of the final week before the Day of Labor, for Labor Day falls late this year, on the 7th. Ayyyy!

  4. long island August 24, 2009 at 5:43 pm #

    Wearing boots like those to work could unleash my inner demon.

    Instead of being know as the sweet office manager I could be the evil she devil to be feared. For example if I was wearing those boots today, I would have bold enough to smack the hand (with a riding crop) of the idiot who handed in an expense receipt for a $1.25 package of gum.

  5. long island August 24, 2009 at 5:47 pm #

    The ZAPPOS description, “What is this maddening masquerade? Challenge the charming cabaret with an opulent opus vexed with victorious villainy! Strategize a joyful juxtaposition of passionate past and fascinating future decked out in this bewitching boot by Jean Paul Gaultier™!”

    Wow. Someone at Zappos let their imagination run away with them.

  6. Style Bard August 24, 2009 at 7:09 pm #

    <3 these shoes!

  7. Icy @ Individual Chic August 24, 2009 at 7:36 pm #

    They are almost very me, I would just need a more agressive foot shape. Something a little chunkier perhaps?

  8. SusanC August 25, 2009 at 1:50 am #

    Oh, somehow JPG made a sensible heeled boot that is absolutely sexy and oh… slightly evil. I fantasize about wearing these in my college class – maybe kids might think twice about asking if they could redo the quiz because they didn’t “like their grade” the first time around.

    And yes, please give us more Monday adventures about life in the ‘burbs in a huge-yet-still-overcrowded-house-with-Gary.

  9. megaera August 25, 2009 at 2:05 am #

    WICKED!!!!

  10. slownews August 25, 2009 at 11:07 am #

    If my Gary bought these for me, I would never, ever again complain about half hearted efforts in bathroom cleaning. Ever.

  11. class factotum August 25, 2009 at 11:18 am #

    asking if they could redo the quiz because they didn’t “like their grade” the first time around

    Tell me you are joking, please. Nobody has the gall to do that, do they?

  12. La BellaDonna August 25, 2009 at 1:02 pm #

    Oooh, La BellaDonna, she loves the boots! She is also in love – or at least in sympathy – with the Gary. How she would enjoy installing the mailboxes with him!

    She would love to read more of the adventures of the household of the Gary, who knows how to look forward to life’s little pleasures.

    For instance, La BellaDonna would like to see the Gary take on the students of the SusanC. The ones who are asking if they could redo the quiz because they didn’t “like their grade” the first time around.

    La BellaDonna, she is horrified and disgusted. She also thinks that if the students truly did not like their grades, they would have studied more beforehand. She hopes that the SusanC, she laughs merrily before responding with the resounding “NO!”

  13. SusanC August 25, 2009 at 3:06 pm #

    Alas, ClassF- I am not. And I even get people asking at the end of the semester if they can do an extra credit assignment to raise their grade, like, maybe writing a 15 page paper. (When I die and go to TheBadPLace, I think my punishment will be reading 15 page papers by mediocre students.)

    So as you can see, I need these boots badly.

  14. SusanC August 25, 2009 at 3:15 pm #

    While I don’t laugh at students openly, LaBelladonna, I do raise my eyebrows and give them The Look. But given I have no Gary to mete out academic Darwin awards to those deserving of them, these boots would help, dontcha think?

  15. SusanC August 25, 2009 at 3:41 pm #

    Oh, LaBellaDonna, I cannot laugh at my students openly, and there is no Gary in my life to mete out academic Darwin awards. I do however give such students The Look(tm), which would be amped up were I wearing these boots.

  16. valawhoo August 25, 2009 at 4:32 pm #

    Gary seems like a good guy.

  17. La BellaDonna August 26, 2009 at 9:31 am #

    Not only does La BellaDonna think that you need and deserve the boots, SusanC, she likes to think of you treading upon the students as if they were the little sour grapes whilst you were wearing them.

    Especially since the students, they are already providing you with the whine.

  18. raincoaster August 26, 2009 at 6:03 pm #

    Tell Gary to use a rubberized post for the mailbox; the spring can fling an arm a good hundred yards.

    I uh, read it someplace.