Manolo says, it is Monday and you are back at your desk, somewhat rueful that your breakfast consisted of two cups of coffee, three bite-sized Snickers, two Starbursts, and the small box of Runts (you love the banana-shaped ones).
But what could you do? When you came down the stairs this morning, there was the giant tub of candy sitting on the counter, where you had left it yesterday afternoon when you fled the house for the lengthy bicycle ride, taken to assuage the guilt of your out-of-control candy-binging.
You know you should be more temperate, but Halloween is the worst. You love it so much, and always have, but it is the worst.
The instant it arrives, you flash back to the greedy little girl who on Halloween night would rush to her room with the plastic pumpkin full of candy treats, slamming the door on her little brother’s fingers, and frantically gobbling as much as possible before her mother intervened.
“Honey,” your Mom would call through the door, “why don’t you come out here with the rest of us and show us what you got tonight?”
“Mmphugh, mmphugh NO!!!!” You would shout back, bits of half-chewed Butterfingers spraying across the room.
Threats and counter-threats would be made, and then the tears would flow, as the holy blessed pumpkin was placed on top of the refrigerator, so as to put the parental governor on your consumption. (Like your little brother, who always ate his candy more slowly, that pumpkin would taunt you for days to come with his candy-filled, gap-toothed grin.)
Naturally, when you had children of your own, you understood why the pumpkin had to be placed on top of the refrigerator, although you also understood why the best candies would seem to disappear when the pumpkin was on the refrigerator; because your parents frequently dipped into it, the family tradition you have maintained.
Now, that your youngest is fifteen, your biggest Halloween problem is preventing her from going out the front door dressed like the Hoochie-Mama Witch, or the Slutty Hermoine Granger. (Oy, what has happened to society?)
Although, you are also responsible for buying the candy, which is how the ridiculous abundance of Skittles, and Milky Ways, and Snickers, and Starbursts, and Runts came to be sitting in the giant bowl on your counter.
Speaking of candy…Look! Here is the Kandy-Kolored, Tangerine-Flaked, Streamline baby from Christian Louboutin.