Things that Greatly Irritate The Manolo

Manolo says, people who do not give credit were credit is due.

The Manolo has just noticed the following post at Jezebel: How to Accept a Compliment.

Kate Harding points out a skill that often escapes even the most accomplished women: accepting compliments without self-deprecation. So how to acknowledge your awesomeness without being an ass?

Naturally, the Manolo’s interest was piqued by this post and the link to Kate Harding’s site, for the Manolo knows that his own Miss Plumcake covered this very topic early last week, with her post, Five Great Lessons from Finishing School: Pt 2 Merci Mercy Me (ugh).

For some reason we are just not taught how to respond graciously to a compliment.





I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve told a girlfriend she looked fantastic only to have her automatically touch her hair or make a face and respond “No, I look awful.”

It takes all my generations of breeding and counting to ten not to snatch her bald and say “Listen, I’ve got better taste than you do. I’ve ALWAYS had better taste than you do, so when I say you look nice, shut up and say ‘thank you’ because people pay me a LOT of money for my approval and it doesn’t come easily.”

And while I understand women are conditioned to deflect any compliment because GOD FORBID a woman think highly of herself (or worse, actually be BETTER than someone else) denying a honestly-paid compliment is one thing and one thing only:


Okay two things: rude and stupid.

Wait, three: rude and stupid and annoying.

When you fail to accept a compliment graciously, it’s an insult to the person who paid it.

And yet, nowhere was our brilliant Miss Plumcake mentioned by either the Jezebel people (excusable as they are not part of the so-called Fatosphere) or by Kate Harding (not excusable, for she is supposedly the great champion of the Fatosphere).

Common courtesy and blogger etiquette of long-standing says we must always acknowledge our debts to other bloggers. Thus, it is ironic, is it not, that the blogger blogging about etiquette would so egregiously ignore it?

Update 4/28/10: Kate Harding has explained the circumstances to the satisfaction of the Manolo, followed by apologies from all parties involved, and the return of mutual comity.