Archive - October, 2010

The Shoes of the Sheikha Mozah

Manolo says, it is the picture of the Sheikha Mozah bint Nasser al Missned, the elgant wife of the Emir of Qatar with some dowdy peoples who are dressed for the Halloween party…

Sheika Mozah bint Nasser al-Missned and some peple she met on the street.

She is so beautiful, elegant and glamorous, and look at the shoes she is wearing….

The super fantastic shoes of Sheika Mozah bint Nasser al Missned

Polar Bear Fur and Icicles!

Ayyy! Icicles and polar bear fur! Those are marvelously extravagant and most super fantastic indeed!

And, later, at the Halloween party…

(more…)

Manolo the Columnist: Heidi from Kamik

Manolo says, here is the Manolo’s latest column for the Express of the Washington Post.

Dear Manolo,

I’m supposed to help at my daughter’s grade school’s Fall Festival next weekend. The problem is, that the festival will be held outdoors if it doesn’t rain, but even then, the field is sure to be muddy and wet, and all I have is a pair of whimsical lady bug rain boots I purchased several years ago in a moment of weakness. I’m a single mom, so I’d like to look a little more sophisticated, because, well, you never know. Please suggest something.

Lisa

Manolo says, it is true, that we have entered the era of the whimsical wellie, of the adult women strutting about in public wearing the rain boots more suitable for the toddlers.

And while the Manolo is not opposed to the certain level of amusement and colorfulness in the rain boots, he must draw the line at the frogs, the rubber duckies, and pink pirate boots, all of which he has seen lately on ladies of the certain age.

Of the course, for the outdoorsy women, the Manolo usually recommends adopting the costumes of the English countryside, which are both practical and attractive, although, there is the danger of looking as if you were preparing to muck out the stables.

Here is Heidi from Kamik, the reasonably priced, yet attractive rain boot that will having you looking good in jeans and the sweater.

Heidi Rain Boot from Kamik

Miss Plumcake on the Maura Kelly/Marie Claire Debacle

Manolo says, if you are perhaps not aware, the big girl blogosphere is in the justifiable uproar about someone named Maura Kelly, who has written the very nasty piece about the large peoples on television in the Marie Claire.

Naturally, our friend Miss Plumcake has somthing to say about that.

I was all geared up to do a Suck It: Marie Claire and Maura Kelly for the execrable piece of trash Ms Kelly wrote and Marie Claire published that, had it been said about any other minority group, would have gotten her fired.

But I’m not.

Because rule one of being a decent human being is not to beat someone when they’re down.

Mostly I feel sorry for her. That is not the writing of a happy camper. If her body issues are so severe and long-lasting that she’s still making physical size into a moral issue….

But, you must go read the whole thing for yourself.

Dolce & Gabbana Calf-Hair Leopard Knee Boots for the Pumpkin Patch

Manolo says, finally, after much wishing your part, that broad-shouldered man with the cornflower-blue eyes and the curly hair has asked you to accompany him on the outing to the rural pumpkin patch with this three nephews, Huey, Dewey and Louie (or so you imagine them).

But, although you have the high-end blue jeans, the rustic-fabulous sweater, and your trusty Barbour coat all picked out and ready to go, you realize that this combination, while perfectly appropriate, is perhaps too muted. You must complete the outfit with feetwear that are both practical and capable of expressing your inner diva.

The thigh-high boots you have been coveting, while stunning, are perhaps too pirate strumpety for this solemn occasion, in which your good humor and facility at child management are sure to be evaluated. And, yet the pull of the dramatic statement inexorably pulls you towards something….

Something…

Something…..animalistic and atumnal, something appropriate and wild…

Dolce & Gabbana Calf-Hair Leopard Knee Boots

Something, such as these Dolce & Gabbana Calf-Hair Leopard Knee Boots

Whose Shoes Wednesday…The Answer!

Manolo asked, whose shoes?

Katie Couric's Shoes

Manolo answers, it is the Katie Couric!

Congratulations to the Manolo’s internet friend Moxie who was the first person to correctly identify this week’s personage of note!

Cooking with Gin

Manolo says, from our friend the Raincoaster writing at the Manolo’s Food Blog

Round about the time they were serving the fourth cocktail, things got a little cross-talky, but hey, that’s how you know the party is a hit, right? At that point, Rob introduced the Bombay Sapphire Salsa Fresca that he’d made, and which I can highly recommend.

Whose Shoes Wednesday

Manolo asks, whose shoes?

The Manolo Twitters

Manolo says, here is the briefest taste of what you are missing if you are not following the 140-character musings of the Manolo on Twitter.

Ayyyy! Taylor Swift and Jake Gyllenhall are the “hot item”!! He squeezed her hand in the brotherly fashion!!!

*****

Perhaps the best remade music video ever… http://bit.ly/aefsIH

*****

Madonna is to Lady Gaga as the Shark is to the Clown Fish.

*****

Jake Gyllenhaal and Taylor Swift, it is like Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, without the crazy.

*****

So you can be like the tiny glittery linebacker? RT @LuckyMagazine: Why You Should Wear Shoulder Pad Sweater Like Kim Kardashian http://ow.ly/19D81h

*****

Jake Gyllenhaal &Taylor Swift = Rock Hudson & Doris Day, without the burning passion.

*****

Madonna is to Laday Gaga as the Mongol Hordes are to the Key West Gay Pride Parade.

*****

Katy Perry and Russell Brand are our generations new Pierre and Marie Curie!

*****

9 Year Old Girls, Miley Cyrus, and the Stripper Pole…what could possibly go wrong? http://bit.ly/9KP8oU #MileyCyrus

*****

For the people who love crafts: Scrapbooking with Johnny Rotten…http://bit.ly/c6bhGt #punk

*****

Katy Perry and Russell Brand got married in the Hindu ceremony? What, was the Ugaritic Temple of Baal all booked up?

*****

Utterly Hilarious posting from one of the Manolo’s internet friends: Putin’s “Bitch Please Face”.. http://bit.ly/aLeCK9

*****

Ayyy! Katy Perry & Russell Brand just got married…they are like this generation’s Nefertiti and Amenhotep IV!

*****

Madonna is to Lady Gaga, as Nosferatu is to the Cookie Monster.

Hurry, go sign up for the Manolo’s Twitterings.

Fashion Week Atlantis

Have you seen what they found in the nuclear plant's cooling ponds?

Manolo says, ayyyy! Ursula went on the Jenny Craig!

Happy Sts Crispin and Crispinian’s Day!

Manolo says, Happy Sts. Crispin and Crispinian’s Day! The Patron Saints of Shoemakers! Today is the day to celebrate those hardworking peoples who bring us such inestimable joy.

Look, here from the Manolo’s internet friend the Coudre Mode, is the video of one of the cobblers at the John Fluevog making the shoe by hand…

Cana Pump from John Fluevog

The finished product, the Cana Pump in purplish.

One truly appreciates the shoes and the people who make them, when one sees how much work goes into them, no?

Valentino Studded T-Bar Lizard Pumps For The Monday

Manolo says, it is Monday and you are back at your desk unable to fully concentrate on your working, and it is all because of your husband, Gary, who has officially gone insane.

Frankly, this has been building for several years now, beginning in the early 1999 when Gary acquired the life-sized plastic skeleton at the yard sale.

For the first several months, Bony Bob resided behind the bar down in the Gary Cave, clutching the empty bottle of Schlitz, the half-smoked cigar clenched between his teeth.

However, when Halloween arrived that year, Gary brought Bob up the stairs, seated him in the lawn chair on the front porch and put the block of dry ice in the bucket of hot water beneath him. It was the simple but effective decoration, and many were the compliments that year, which, of the course, was all the encouragement your man needed.

The next year, Bony Bob was moved out to the lawn, into the ersatz graveyard made of styrofoam tombstones and cotton spiderwebs. The year after, marked the acquisition of the professional fog machine and the stuffed vulture. And 2003 saw the installation of the temporary sound system, from which issued, alternately, the ghostly sounds and the manic laughter (both recorded by Gary in the basement).

In 2005, Gary added sophisticated animatronics so that Bony Bob and the vulture, now named Petey, could move and talk. That year, your Halloween candy bill topped $200.

And then things got crazy, and now, planning for the Halloween begins in June, when Gary “conceptualizes” the display using computer drafting tools and scale models of your house and lawn. Of the course, he does not share his plans with anyone until the unveiling, and indeed, right now your front lawn is shrouded behind the 12′ screens he erected last week.

Last year, your house, which had the nearly full-sized pirate ship on the lawn, Cap’n Bony Bob at the wheel, Petey next to him, made the front page of the local paper, and was featured on the News at Six.

And so naturally, Gary vowed to outdo himself, but you have begun to get worried, because you have not seen him for three days, just heard the furious construction noises and noticed the giant pile of empty beer cans in the recycling bin.

“Gary, honey,” you shouted over the screen this morning, “don’t you think you should come in and take break.”

“NO!”

You know what you need now? Shoes, beautiful, unusual, very trendy shoes…

Valentino Studded T-Strap Lizard Pumps

Like these Valentino Studded T-Bar Lizard Pumps which all of the girls in Paris (where Halloween is not such the big deal) are wearing.

Thigh-High Boots for the Poor Girl

Manolo says, one of the Manolo’s internet friends has asked him the question.

Dear Manolo,

After resisting the trend for nearly a year, I feel I can no longer wait. I need, need, need a pair of thigh-high boots. The problem is, I’m a poor working girl, and my budget is limited. Can you please help?

Marissa

It is true the thigh-high boots have been everywhere the Manolo has looked this past year, including on the Papa Hemingway’s great-granddaughter Dree (in the very not safe for the work, photo shoot in Purple). So, yes, the pirate strumpet look is au courant.

As usual, the Manolo would recommend saving your monies until you can afford the truly super fantastic over-the-knee boots. But given the cost of such boots, and how long the trend has been going, there is the strong risk of purchasing the boots just as they go out of style.

And, besides, the Manolo sympathizes with the poor girls, indeed, he knows what it is like to be so poor that you must fashion your own super fantastic pirate boots out of long pieces of tar paper and galvanized roofing tacks left in the dumpster behind the Piggly Wiggly when the roofers had finished.

So, allow the Manolo recommend to you these boots…

Donnie Over-the-Knee Boots from Dolce Vita

The Donnie Over-the-Knee Boot from Dolce Vita, which are selling for around $260 of the American dollars, more than $60 off of the usual price.

Trust the Manolo, unless you can find the good bargain on the quality boots, you should not be buying the thigh-high boots that cost less than this.

Such cheap boots are most often made of synthetic materials by infant labor in the foreign gulag, all things which will bring down upon you bad karma in the form of difficult to eradicate toenail fungus and potential reincarnation as Russell Brand.

Thus, cheap boots are no bargain.

Page 1 of 512345»