The Worst of the Globes of Gold!

By Manolo the Shoeblogger

Manolo says, in general, it was hard to find much serious fault with the outfits that this year graced the carpet of red at the Globes of Gold.


Katey Sagal at the Golden Globes in Douglas Hannant

Ayyyy! She just got the new sewing machine!

Did the Peg Bundy sew this herself?


Sandra Bullock at the Golden Globes in Jenny Packham

Shaggy Do!

No one wishes to say anything bad about America’s Most Wronged Sweetheart, but all the Manolo can think is, where is Sonny, 1967 Cher?


Christina Aguilera at the Golden Globes in Zuhair Murad

Salaciously Trashy.

It is the elderly Mae West!

No, it is just Christina Aguilera, fallen from the great height and landing with the splat in early drag-queen middle age.


Helena Bonham Carter at the Golden Globes in Vivienne Westwood

Manolo hears calliope music.

You know what would really be unusual and transgressive, Ms. Helena Bonham Crazy Lady?

You not showing up looking like the circus clown.

And the worstest of the worstest…

Natalie Portman at the Golden Globes in Viktor & Rolf

The good girl voted most likely to succeed, everyone felt sorry for her when she found herself in the 'family way'.

Ayyyy! She looks just like the Queen of the Continuing Education School Prom!


19 Responses to “The Worst of the Globes of Gold!”

  1. blackbird Says:

    I agree on each and every count. No surprise.

  2. Anonymous Says:

    Agree on all counts…

  3. daisyj Says:

    The shape of Ms. Portman’s dress is really quite lovely; it’s a shame about the terrible color and embellishment.

  4. Manolo the Shoeblogger Says:

    We should all be able to agree that giant roses encrusting our bosoms is rarely the good idea.

  5. Anna @ShoeHunting Says:

    I agree with everything you said. And what did The Manolo think of the disastrous shoe/gown pairing of Olivia Wilde??

  6. Manolo the Shoeblogger Says:

    It was too much gown for her, and for the occasion. The Manolo could not even see the shoes with all of that sparkly frou-frou going on.

  7. The Charlotte Allen Says:

    The rose is awful, but the dress is downright elegant tasteful compared to Ms. Bonham-Carter’s. From the Queen Mum to Queen of the Thrift Shop!

  8. Phyllis Says:

    I can relate the the mismatched shoes, but I did get dressed in the dark that day.

  9. class factotum Says:

    Phyllis, in my first job out of college, I spent three weeks at the corporate office for training. The day we were to meet the VP of my division, I got to class and looked down at my foot.

    “How odd,” I thought to myself. “I don’t wear black shoes with this suit. I must have put the black shoes on my mistake.”

    Then I looked at my other foot. Where I saw the burgundy shoe that was the appropriate footwear for the outfit in question.

    Oh yes. On the day where I was going to have a chance to impress the big VP, I was wearing mismatched shoes.

  10. Toby Wollin Says:

    Actually, there were some outfits that were attractive, but I found that the ‘blush/nude/pinky-beige’ that is being flogged out there as ‘THE’ color this year is actually boring, invisible, and aging. Sandra Bullock’s dress just doubled her ‘feel sorry for me’ gig from the hair. You did not choose Julianne Moore’s fuschia Lanvin monstrosity, which looked like she called Albaz at the last minute and he was left with a bolt of dupioni, a staple gun and a half a broken necklace to do all his magic with. The color was challenging enough with her hair color and skin tone but the dress itself was a horror.

  11. Allison Says:

    I loved Halle’s dress without the train…

  12. Dani Says:

    Manolo, when you mentioned the Globes of Gold, I was sure you were referring to the top half of that orange dress!

  13. Sarah F Says:

    Yes, there was certainly too much beige/pink this year. It was refreshing to see dresses like Catherine Zeta-Jones’, which was lovely and a beautiful dark green.

    I agree with Toby; Julianne Moore’s dress was…well, she looked like some kind of socialite about to go postal. And I was very disappointed at the number of women who wore stunning gowns and had hair that looked like a teenager had done it for a rave party. Or a case of Annette Bening bed-head.

  14. Manolo the Shoeblogger Says:

    The pink was good, although too many peoples chose it.

    However, it green that was the color of the night…

    The Manolo was frankly surprised, because green is such the difficult color to pull off, and all of the ladies who wore it did well with it.

  15. Dani Says:

    What a wonderful color! Jolie and Zeta-Jones look truly fabulous (I think Zeta-Jones is simply incapable of looking any other way), but I think I have to agree with Scarlett O’Hara- green really is not for blondes.

  16. Little Red Says:

    Angelina Jolie: LOVED LOVED the emerald green Versace.

    Nicole Kidman: Nice but boring and it washed her out. But at least, she’s gone back to being a redhead. Next stop, bring back the curls.

  17. Rubiatonta Says:

    Could we at least give H B-C credit for getting the red and green shoes on the correct feet (red for port, green for starboard)?

  18. Stephanie Says:

    Those are some pretty horrible outfits.

  19. speasummerlin Says:

    I thought Mila Kunis also looked quite wonderful in the deep green, and January Jones knocked my(imaginary)socks off!!

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