By The Class Factotum

N.B. The third offering from the Manolo’s guest blogging friends comes from the wonderfully droll Class Factotum, who tells us the heartwarming tale of feetwear triumphant.

It’s been a long winter here in the frozen north, where even the Friday fish fry at the Saints Constantine and Helen Greek Orthodox Church, Kopps Never Enough Chocolate frozen custard, and fried cheese curds (all of which give me that protective Milwaukee Roll) are not enough to banish the doldrums of short, cold, icy days.

The one thing that has kept me going is the promise of wearing pretty shoes again.

In the winter, there is no point to wearing nice shoes because they are sure to be ruined when one steps into the sludge waiting in the street.

The Driveway of Death

The Driveway of Death

The most important quality in a shoe in the winter, for those of us who are not driven everywhere by chauffeur and dropped off at the front door of the opera, the symphony, and Walgreen’s, is good traction. Traction is important because it keeps one from slipping on the icy Driveway of Death as one is trying to carry groceries from the car to the house.

But my Teal Leopard Print Heels with the Tangerine Ribbon await.

Teal Leopard Print with Tangarine Bow

Teal Leopard Print with Tangarine Ribbon

Oh Teal Leopard Print Heels with the Tangerine Ribbon, how I adore you. I admire your Teal and Tangerine funkiness, an antidote to my dreary life of shoveling the driveway and the sidewalk again.

I look at you and think, “There is life out there! There is sun! There is warmth! There is wearing less than all my clothes at once just to stay warm!

“And soon, the Teal Leopard Print Heels with the Tangerine Ribbon will again be applauded in a restaurant, not only validating the shoes but proving to my husband, who thinks it is perfectly appropriate to have two dozen watches but doesn’t understand shoe fabulosity, that yes, the Teal Leopard Print Heels with the Tangerine Ribbon are the coolest shoes ever.”

Applauded at a restaurant, you ask?

French Style Tables

The scene of my triumph.

Why yes.

The Teal Leopard Print Heels with the Tangerine Ribbon were applauded at a restaurant last fall, on one of the last days when it was safe to wear Nice Shoes.

We sat at our table, which was, French-style, crammed in with other tables because what is the point of wasting restaurant space on floor when you can have more people eating, even if they are elbow to elbow with the strangers at the next table?

The only place to put my feet was either under the table – as if! – or crossed casually to the side, in the aisle on the bar side, with one of the Teal Leopard Print Heels with the Tangerine Ribbon dangling off my recently-manicured toes.

Alas, nobody noticed the shoe until dessert, when the owner of the restaurant walked by our table.

She looked down.

She stopped.

She gasped.

She said, “Your shoes are gorgeous!”

I beamed. “Thanks!”

The waiter next to her turned to look.

“Oh yes!” he exclaimed. “Oh my! Those are fab!”

I turned to my husband. “I told you so!”

The owner looked puzzled.

I explained. “He didn’t understand why I like these shoes so much and why I had to get them.”

The owner shook her head. “They are O. M. G.!”

We were gathering attention. Which I hate. Ha.

The women at the table behind me said, “Let us see!”

I showed them the shoes and they twittered approvingly.

“My husband thought I shouldn’t have bought them if I didn’t already have something to wear with them!” I told them.

They glared at my husband, which was maybe a little more than he deserved, but he had denied the fabulosity of the Teal Leopard Print Heels with the Tangerine Ribbon.

People behind my husband were craning to see, so I took one shoe off and held it up.

“Brava!” mouthed a man four tables away as he clapped lightly.

“I am vindicated and validated,” I told my husband.

He admitted that maybe I was right – that the Teal Leopard Print Heels with the Tangerine Ribbon are extraordinary. The owner smiled approvingly at me as she walked away.

Spring is coming. And with it, the chance to wear the Teal Leopard Print Heels with the Tangerine Ribbon again and the chance to revel in the admiration of strangers. I can’t wait.


8 Responses to “Triumph!”

  1. Donna Collins Says:

    Gorgeous! What brand are they?

  2. Nancy Says:

    Yes!!! Where can we ALL get teal leopard print heels with tangerine ribbons?!

  3. The gold digger Says:

    Donna and Nancy, they are Chinese Laundry. And you know what makes it even better? I got them for TWELVE DOLLARS at the Divine Consign sale at the Jewish Community Center in Shorewood! The only thing better than the gorgeous shoe is the gorgeous shoe at a bargain!

  4. Nancy Says:

    I bet they used to belong to Heather.

  5. April Says:

    No, if they had belonged to Heather, they would be in my closet, awaiting the “safe for shoes” season!

  6. erik nabler Says:

    Lovely post. Greatly enjoyed it.

  7. The Accidental Tangoiste Says:

    Oh my goodness, those are fabulous! Applause well deserved!

  8. Glinda Says:

    Whoo hoo, class factotum! And of course, great shoes!

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