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Celebrity | Manolo's Shoe Blog - Part 20
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The Bachelorette (Size 4, 116 Pounds) is Fat!

Manolo says, Glinda at the Teeny Manolo reads the Us Weekly Magazine so that we do not have to.Trista Sutter is Fat!

E-list “celebrity” Trista Sutter (the Bachelorette, just to remind anyone who may have watched the show) is on a mission to lose weight. You see, only three months ago, she became a mother. But according to her, “I’m definitely not pleased when I look in the mirror.” Trista, weighing in at a whopping 116 pounds and size four, wants to lose that pesky baby weight, stat!

In an interview with US Magazine, Trista reveals how she especially dislikes

my belly. It has a layer of fat, which, of course, your body has to put on, but it’s blubbery and I hate it. I want to be able to go bathing suit shopping for a vacation and not feel totally disgusted… I just don’t feel good in a lot of my clothes.

Trista, Trista. Can I sit down with you for a second? We need to have a conversation. Go ahead and get comfy, because this might take a while.

Naturally, Glinda attempts to set her straight.

Meanwhile, at the Manolo for the Big Girl, Plumcake takes the more practical approach.

Whose Shoes Wednesday, The Answer

Manolo asked, whose shoes?

Manolo answers, it is the Katie Holmes!

Congratulations to the Cat, who has once again been the first to correctly identify whose shoes.

After looking at many, many pictures of the Katie Holmes, that Manolo has to say that he has rarely seen any person more ill at ease in front of the camera.

Louboutin Over-the-Knee Boots and How Not to Wear Them

Manolo says, the words “Christian Louboutin Over-the-Knee Boots” shout SEXY, but here you see Mariah Carey and Jennifer Lopez demonstrating that there is the fine line between sexy and ridiculous. Mimi simply looks ready to do the Pretty Woman stroll on Hollywood Blvd.

As for the J-Lo, all the Manolo could think about was this…

Which is clearly not what Christian Louboutin had in mind.

Depardieu!

Manolo says, Witness, Depardieu! The mightiest of God’s creations! See how he rears up on two trunk-like legs, exuding raw animal sexuality and the heady scent of rendered pork fat!

Who could possibly imitate this natural marvel?

Whose Shoes Wednesday…The Answer

Manolo asked, whose shoes?

Kathy Griffin Loves the Shoes

Manolo answers, the Kathy Griffin!

Congratulations to the Manolo’s internet friend Cat, who was the first to identify whose shoes.

The Manolo loves the Kathy Griffin. Yes, she is crude, over-the-top, and somewhat out-of-control with the plastic surgery and the hair coloring, but for all of that she is exceedingly funny and her fashion sense is not bad.

The Insufferable Trumps

Manolo says, it is not often the Manolo feels like slapping someone based solely upon appearances.

It is unprecedented that he would feel this way about three peoples at once.

Elizabeth Taylor, Fashion Icon?

Manolo says, the picture of the Elizabeth Taylor, from the 1970s, in the white hot pants has convinced the Manolo to say the few words about Liz and her fashion sense.

To wit: she does not seem to have much, or perhaps more properly, she seemed to lose any sense she did have right around the year 1967.

But you must judge for yourself..

Here she is young and gorgeous, dressed in the Chinese-style outfit with beautiful shoes, the very model of chic.

But this image is no indication of personal style, for when you are in your twenties and exceedingly beautiful, it matters not the least what you wear, your beauty negates your ugly clothes.

The true test of style begins in your thirties, when your looks begin to fade ever so slightly, and artifice become more important.

Work it girlfriend!

It is 1963 and Liz, 31, is perfectly accessorized with the gloves, the shoes, the purse and the most gorgeous coat. Even the hat, which would otherwise be faintly ridiculous, works here. Of the course, it does not hurt that she has also accessorized herself with Richard Burton.

It is the Manolo’s belief that this represents the high-water mark of the Elizabeth Taylor style.

And now, the trainwreck begins.

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Like Riding a Wire Fence

Manolo says, the Professor Ann provides us with another memorable fashion-related quote.

“And another thing – the crotch, down where your nuts hang – is always a little too tight… so when you make them up, give me an inch that I can let out there, uh because they cut me, it’s just like riding a wire fence. These are almost, these are the best I’ve had anywhere in the United States…”

“But, uh when I gain a little weight they cut me under there. So, leave me , you never do have much of margin there. See if you can’t leave me an inch from where the zipper (burps) ends, round, under my, back to my bunghole, so I can let it out there if I need to. “

Plain-Spoken Vulgarity thy name is Mr. President!

Whose Shoes Wednesday…The Answer

Manolo asked, whose shoes?

Liz Taylor in go-go boots!

Manolo answers, it is the Elizabeth Taylor!

Congratulations to the Manolosphere’s own, Mr. Henry, who was the first person to recognize these shoes as belonging to the inimitable Liz.

Ayyyy!

Manolo says, ayyyy! Keira Knightley stars in Thriller and Thrillability.

At Some Point They Become Stilts

Platform Shoes Taken to Their Logical Extreme.

Manolo says, there is only one person who would wear such ridiculous feetwear.

Answer below the jump.

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Miss Havisham, 2007

Manolo says, what bothers the Manolo here is not that Carrie Bradshaw is the older bride, but that this gown emphasizes how Sarah Jessica Parker has exercised herself into the haggard state. She appears desiccated, as if all of the life and youth have been wrung out of her.

The result is pathetic and faintly tragic.

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