Manolo asks, what is happening at the Lanvin?

The torturing of the models with the agonizing shoes…

Lanvin designer Alber Elbaz recently explained that he had to scrap a lot of the heels in his spring 2011 show because “We did the rehearsal and all of a sudden I saw the girls couldn’t walk. I saw the agony in their faces. They were shaking; they looked like alcoholic girls.”

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The release of the frightening and nightmarishly surreal promotional video ..

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The normally adorable fashion director looking like Norman Bates’ chubby cousin.

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Dearest Alber, the Manolo must ask, is everything okay?

Wait the second, the Manolo seems to remember the picture from last year….

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Manolo says, it is Monday and you are back at your desk both exhausted and filled with candy, principally the Snickers, with the miscellaneous assortment of Skittles, Runts, Jolly Ranchers and Tootsie Rolls filling the smaller spaces in your digestive tract.

Frankly, you are agitated, your mind filled with many questions, for the example:

Query: When did the full-sized candy bar become the mark of civic generosity?

Query: Does your insistence on handing out the “Fun Size” bars of candy mean you are the bad person whose shrubbery and home should be covered in toilet paper?

Query: Were you wrong to scowl ferociously at the three hulking teenagers who came to the door late in the evening dressed as Juggalos? Did you not drop the single fun-sized Baby Ruth into each of their bulging pillowcases, despite the distaste you felt?

Query: How difficult is to get congealed egg yolk off of your automobile?

You know what it is you need now?

Shoes!

Look! Here is the strikingly original Chinese-basket-esqe open-toed platform ankle boots from Alexander McQueen.

Exactly what is needed to erase the bitter taste of post-Halloween shame

N.B. In honor of the Manolo’s six years of shoeblogging, the Manolo has decided to repost this week some of his favorite pieces.

Today, the Manolo has set the Wayback machine for October 5th, 2005 to see the post about our favorite funky little fashion troll, John Galliano.

You are looking at me, am I not magnificent and seductive?

Now I will look back… Full Seduction!

At last, I am filled with disdain for you and your looking ways. Yet, is my disdain, in its own right, not also seductive?

Manolo says, Ahoy! Mon Funky Little Fashion Captain!

Manolo says, the art of the photoshoppery has achieved miracles on the behalf of the Dolce & the Gabbana!

Ayyyyy! They have made Madonna beautiful!

And, now, notice in the next photos how they have removed the tiara and made the eyeglasses darker…

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Manolo says, these Reed Krakoff shearling sandals are simply stunning in this dove-gray-on-gray combination (indeed, they make the entire outfit for Our Miss Amanda Brooks over at the website of the marvelous Garance Doré’s).

What the Manolo loves most about this shoe is that it is at once restrained and sensual; the perfect combination of the Apollonian and the Dionysian. It has the clean, intellectual lines, and yet one can feel the pleasure-giving softness of the shearling.

If, you are looking for super fantastic shoes you could not do better than the latest collection from the Reed Krakoff, the name you will be hearing more of in the immediate future.

Manolo says, here to start your summer’s day with the pleasant surprise is the pair of perfectly summertastic, pink Alexander McQueen sandals, selling for more than 50% off of the regular price, the savings of nearly $370 of the American dollars.

Manolo says, frankly, the latest crop of Russian super models leaves something to be desired.

P.S. What sort of designer would think this is the good idea?

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Manolo says, it is the look on her face that really sells it.

The designer eyepatch, circa 2005, circa 2007.

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Manolo says, the Manolo was doing his usual surfing through the online shoe stores (because that is the way the Manolo doth roll), when he came across these beautiful Alexander McQueen items, all of which are selling at more then the 50% off of the usual price.

These flitilicious little black, flat sandals are selling for more than 55% off of the regular price.

For the Manolo these creative high-heeled sandals, which are reduced over $700 from the regular price, are exactly what you might wear to your next semi-fancy evening soiree, where you would undoubtedly be the envy of all.

The Manolo does not know if last season’s trend for the over-the-knee, flat piratical boot will continue, or not, however, if you are intent on following that trend (despite perhaps sensible advice to the contrary), these Alexander McQueen flat boots are on the sale for 56% off of the regular price, the savings of over $900 of the American dollars!

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Manolo says, perhaps it is time for the Manolo to revive the Gallery of the Horrors…

These are not just the simple Birkenstocks-which-have-mated-with-stilettos-thus-violating-all-that-is-holy , but rather the pleather Birkenstocks-meets-the-stilettos, and not just made-from-faux-leather Birken-stilettos, but also the $625 fake leather, mutant Birken-heels.

Meanwhile, back on planet Earth, $625 American dollars can get you these….

The Jimmy Choo Suave Satin Sandals, with almost enough change left over to buy these…

The Elie Tahari Carlise flat sandals.

Of the course, the Manolo would never object to paying this much for beautiful shoes. But for ugly shoes which pay homage to the crunchy granola shoes for pretentious peasants, and which are made of petroleum by-products? Never!

Via the New York Daily News

Manolo says, winter, winter go away, bring the Manolo the fine spring day!

So that he may see these shoes on the feets of his friends.

The Kayla from Elizabeth and James in bright multi-snake yellow-yellow-yellow.

The Lacross from Stuart Weitzman in sea patent aniline blue-blue-blue.

The Estelle Wedge from the Dolce and the Gabbana in kelly-esque, sorta-MG-racing greeny-greeny-green.

And now, this is the time on the Shoe Blogs when the Manolo dances!