Manolo’s Shoe Blog

Manolo says, here is the Manolo’s latest column for the Express of the Washington Post.

Dear Manolo,

At Christmas, I broke down and bought my 16-year-old daughter a pair of Classic Ugg boots, and now she wears them everywhere. And I have to admit, she looks super cute in them. Which has got me to thinking, perhaps I should buy myself a pair, they look so warm and toasty. What’s your opinion?

Rachel

Manolo says, the Manolo’s opinion of the Classic Ugg boot has always been the same: if you are sixteen and super cute, then the Classic Uggs are “da bomb”. You may wear them everywhere (even with your sweat pants) and people will still think you are the cutesy cute cutey.

If , however, you are the forty-two year old woman of sophistication, then the Classic Ugg boots look silly with almost everything you try on.

Sweat pants? Sloppy!

Faded blue jeans? Trying too hard!

Shortish skirt? Trashy!

The truth is, the Ugg Classic boots, like the dirty ripped blue jeans and the whale-tail thong, are the young person’s fashion. They were designed by the youthful Australian surfers for wearing after the energetically youthful day at the beach, not for women of the certain age to slip on for the day on the town.

Happily, there are the Ugg models which can be worn by elegant ladies. For the example, here is the Gissella, the casual, wedge-heel ankle boot with the Aussie flair.

Manolo says, sometimes the shoe trends slip past the Manolo’s highly tuned shoe radar, such is the case with the rise and popularity of the Däv rain boot, which the Manolo only became aware of last week when dining with the friends.

“Manolo,” said the Manolo’s super fantastic friend, “I really want to get a pair of those fancy rain boots with the high heels. They look like fashion boots but are rubber.”

“Yes, yes, the Manolo loves the Pucci rubber boots with the wedge heels. Pucci makes the Smiles!”

“No, no, Manolo,” she continued, “not those boots, the ones I want are less expensive, but still super fantastic. I can’t remember what they are called.”

“The Marc by Marc Jacobs with the pink hearts,” said the Manolo, “Those are on the sale at the moment.”

“No, no, no. These are new, they have a funny name. Oh, oh, I can’t remember.”

“Funny name,” said the Manolo, “such as the Sporto”

“or, perhaps the Kamik.”

“No,” she said, “it’s got a funny name with an umlaut, sort of like Børn, but different.”

“?”

“Däv,” she shouted, “Däv! Däv! Däv!”

“Ah,” said the Manolo, “those are very nice.”

“Nice! Those are really great. I want a pair!”

“Well,” said the Manolo, “chacun à son goût.”

And now, allow the Manolo to suggest to you, his dear readers, his own personal must-have favorite, the Sperry Top-Sider Sausalito, in the Cherry Red.

Super fantastic!

Manolo says, the Manolo is enjoying the languorous pace of this week between Christmas and the New Years. Please forgive.

In the meantime, here is some beautiful feetwear from Sigerson Morrison that are discounted for your post Christmas festival of regretful semi-frugality.

This fetching ankle bootie, the 9630 from Sigerson Morrison is discounted nearly 30%, the savings of over $225 of the American dollars.

This stylish classic pump, the 9633 from Sigerson Morrison, would be the excellent addition to your everyday wardrobe, and it is on the sale, also almost 30% off the usual price.

Manolo says, here is the Manolo’s latest column for the Express of the Washington Post.

Dear Manolo,

My dear husband fancies himself an outdoorsman, and although he did plenty of hiking and hunting when he was younger, these days he mostly confines his outdoor activities to raking the leaves and long walks in the park. What can you recommend as a Christmas gift that will flatter his self-image without seeming ridiculously woodsy?

Claire

Manolo says, it is true, that in his youth, your man occasionally marched into the great American wilderness with nothing more than the pocket canopener and the bag of pork rinds, emerging one week later covered with large patches of poison ivy, mutant mosquito bites, and enough outdoorsy credibility to last many month, before the whole odious process had to be repeated.

However, once most men enter the age of the middle, such arduous expeditions no longer seem perhaps so pleasant or useful, especially, if like the Manolo, one gets winded walking to the corner for the demitasse of cappuccino. And thus sedentary activities replace the more uncertain pleasures of rough camping in primitive natural settings.

Still, one needs to look sufficiently rugged and manly, without falling over the line into lumberjackery. This is why the Manolo loves Australia’s favorite outdoor boot, the Blundstone. And what could possibly be more manly and rugged than Australian outback boots?

Manolo says, it is Monday, and you are back at your desk furiously burning up the internet in your Cyber Monday quest to purchase as many of the bargain-priced gifts as possible. And it is all because, this year, as God is your witness, you will not wait until the last minute to do your shopping.

Still, your tendency to wait until the last minute is nothing compared to that of your brother, who famously does all of his shopping on Christmas Eve, usually after the normal stores have closed, at the Seven-Eleven or the Quik-Stop, which accounts for the many unusual gifts you and your children and parents have received over the years. (Indeed, who can forget the Christmas in which you unwrapped the brand new oil filter wrench? Or the Christmas in which your children received bags of Slim Jims and cans of the mint flavored snuff?)

Of the course, you suspect that this is one of the many reasons why your brother Bob remains unmarried well into his early forties. Yes, he has plenty of girlfriends, including the exotic dancer who accompanied him to your niece’s christening. She was the one with the shorty-short skirt with the handkerchief hem which very nearly exposed her lady-bits when she sat down. (Gary and your teenaged son still mention her “impressive rack” when they think you are out of ear-shot.)

Sigh.

Oh well, back to the shopping.

Ayyyy! Gucci! Gucci! Gucci!

Gucci! Gucci! Gucci!

Manolo says, it is Tuesday and you are back at your desk doing whatever it is you normally do, but very badly, as you are completely distracted by Thanksgiving, which is now barreling down upon you like the runaway freight train full of free-range turkeys.

Thanksgiving was not supposed to be crazy this year. It was going to be just you and Gary and the kids and your mother. But then your mother called two weeks ago, and said she’d invited your Uncle Bill to fly out from Buffalo for Thanksgiving.

“Okay,” you thought, “one more won’t hurt. Uncle Bill is an old school nut who will probably goad Gary into an argument about professional football. But one more won’t hurt.”

And then your mother informed you that Uncle Bill insisted on inviting his son, your layabout cousin Billy, to fly in from Hollywood to join you. Billy calls himself the “writer-director-actor-producer,” although what he really is is the 43-year-old, cut-rate playboy who subsists on the variety of menial jobs and handouts from your uncle. Although, to his credit, he did once appear as the non-speaking extra on Will and Grace, in the distant background, as the coffee shop patron.

Speaking of people subsisting on handouts, two days after your mother’s call, your daughter Jeannie, who is away at the college, called to say that she has invited some dorm friends home for Thanksgiving — three foreign girls and one Latvian boy — who have nowhere to go for the holiday.

“The more the merrier,” you think. And then the conversation takes the surreal turn.

“Mom,” says Jeannie, “one of the girls is from Africa, and in her culture the turkey is considered sacred.”

“What?”

“We can’t have turkey, because Ki’x'il’ko,” the name included three clicks and the pop, “says her people consider the turkey to be a type of sacred spirit.”

Later, when you tell Gary that you’re going to have to order goose for Thanksgiving, his reply is succinct.

“Bull-crap. The turkey is sacred to my people, too, especially when served with sweet potatoes and cranberry sauce.”

“But we can’t be offending this girl.”

“Tell her it’s a really big chicken. Nobody thinks chickens are holy.”

And then five minutes after you get off the phone with the butcher, who informs you that you cannot order the 23-pound goose, so you’ll need three smaller birds, Jeannie calls back.

“Mom,” she says, “Ki’x'il’ko says it’s okay to have a turkey. She looked up the word. It’s ostrich that’s supposed to be sacred to her people.”

Luckily, you were able to call the butcher back and cancel the flock of geese.

And now, on Tuesday, with two days to go, you are frazzled and distracted from your work. And yet you are also filled with pride that everyone would consider your home and your family as being the good place to celebrate this important holiday.

Look, here is the Christian Louboutin Feticha Botta Platform Boots, simple, beautiful, dead sexy.

Manolo says, above are two similar tall boots from Stuart Weitzman, the Lacemeup and the Buttonup. The Manolo likes both, very much, indeed they are both super fantastic.

And now here is the interesting psycho-stylistic question: Which do you find sexier, the buttons or the laces?

Although, as with all matters of sexiosity, personal taste will undoubtedly figure in your answer, the Manolo has decided, after much deliberation, that he finds laces to be inherently more sexier than the buttons.

Manolo says, here is the Manolo’s latest column for the Express of the Washington Post.

Dear Manolo,

I live in Boston, which has already had some snow this year, and have need of some boots that can withstand the slushy streets and salty sidewalks. While rejecting all form of Ugg-liness thus far, my feet have been very cold, as every pair of boots I find is either made for the abominable snow monster, or for an indoor kind of person. I don’t have a car, so I also need something walkable. Are there any such winter boots (preferably $200 or under) that do not offend the discriminating eye?


Miriam

Manolo says, for much of the country winter has arrived far too early this year, pushing us out of our fantastically trendy but thin-sided boots into feetwear fit for the Earnest Shackleton expedition.

And while such feetwears may insure that your toes do not turn black and fall off while you are waiting for the bus, they also insure that the young men who are waiting for the bus with you, will refer to you as “Dude”, as in “Dude, whatta say we get a brewski, watch the Celtic’s game, and chase some ladies?”

But fear not, for sexy feminine snow boots can come from the most unlikely source, such as Timberland! Here is the Timberland Urban 14” Round Heel boot.

Manolo says, here is the Manolo’s latest column for the Express of the Washington Post.

Dear Manolo,

I need a bit of extra help. I’ve been living in Central Asia for the past 6 years, so I’ve been out of the fashion loop for awhile and don’t know what’s in style. I have a great denim pencil skirt which I could wear with slides over the summer, but what to do now that it’s cooler? I tried it with boots but it looked like I was wearing Wellingtons and a gunny sack. Don’t worry, it’s not a long skirt. At least, I know that the hippie/granny thing is a faux pas.

Tracey

Manolo says, the way the Manolo’s friend has described her exile, it is as if she were the movie star trapped on Gilligan’s Island, without access to Vogue or basic cable television.

And now the rescue boat has arrived, and she realizes that she has been wearing the same out-of-date, peach-colored, Bob Mackie gown for the whole six years.

“Ayyyyy! Professor Manolo, help me!” She shouts, “the paparazzi will be waiting for me at the pier. Hurry! Style me to so I may not be embarrassed by my photo on the cover of People”

“Here,” says the Professor Manolo, “I have fashioned you this denim pencil skirt out of the Skipper’s pants. Wear it with these thick, ribbed tights and these retro, oxford-style suede booties which have washed ashore. They are the Elise from Via Spiga, and I have scientifically calculated that the trends this year include ankle boots such as these and patterned tights, so you should be fine.”