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Manolo the Columnist: Metallic Flower Sandals from Miu Miu

Dear Manolo,

Now that the first day of spring has arrived, I find that I need a new pair of sandals suitable to the season. I would describe my style as understated and classic, but this year I’m feeling a powerful need for something a little more colorful than usual. Please help.

Marci

Manolo says, the spring, it has sprung! Finally has arrived is the most glorious time of the year, when the Mother Nature shakes off the gloomy gloaming of winter, hitches up her skirts and gets to work painting the countryside in the riotous shades of green and gold, accenting the fields with flowers and the trees with singing birds.

How can one not be in love with this vernal season, when life returns to the Earth, bringing with it the hope for better days and warmer weather?

It is only natural that we should wish to respond favorably to this bounteous love offering by choosing to wear colorful clothing and beautiful shoes. How better to honor our fabulous good fortune, and the Divine Providence that has provided it, than by expressing our joy in as many ways as possible, with the smiles and kind words, the cheerful mien, and the beautiful happy clothing? Our outward appearance should be the reflection of the happiness that resides within, so that others my share in the mood of the season.

Here is the glittery, jeweled flower metallic sandals from Miu Miu, the perfectly gorgeous sandals for the perfectly gorgeous time of the year.

Miu Miu Metallic Sandal

Multiple Choice Time: Dolce & Gabbana

I’m going to Italy with two pairs of shoes. Talk about a tough decision. I mean, it’s Italy. That’s where the shoes were BORN. Selecting one pair of flats and one of heels was like Sophie’s Choice, except you can always have more kids, but Miu Miu only made those vernice slingbacks one season.

As much as I’d like to traipse around the cobblestones of Italia in my most precarious heels, it’s not going to happen. You need to be either a billy goat or an Italian woman to carry that off and since I am neither (although I do share their mutual predisposition to facial hair), I had to leave my fanciest foot coverings at home.

My grandfather, whose mother was Scottish and father was Welsh, used to tell us we were Italian.

Familial legend has it two Italian brothers were shipwrecked on the coast of Wales sometime in the early 19th century and settled down with a pair of local girls. Although it would explain the slightly Italianate name before the fine folks at Ellis Island decided to change it, I suspect it’s mostly fanciful thinking, much like how he told me his got his kidney shot out by a specialized kidney sniper in Okinawa (he was born with only one).

Dolce & Gabbana have been playing the Italian card even harder than usual lately and I have loved every minute of it. I’m especially excited to see the low, ladylike heel from seasons past show up again in the SS2013 collection.

I mean, I love a 5″ ankle buster as much as the next girl, but I’m already 5’10″ and now that I’m in a dance company in a nation where I passed the average height for men in the fifth grade, I’ve got to be careful about heel height lest my partner for the evening inadvertently end up wearing my sweaterpuppies for earmuffs.

 

So which Dolce & Gabbana is your favorite? I like the colorful kitten heel, although the whimsical side of me is crazy for the references to Roman aqueducts and Ionic columns.

Miu Miu Gingham Taffeta Sandals for the First Day of Summer!

Miu Miu Blue Gingham Taffeta SandalMiu Miu Red Tafetta Gingham Sandals

Manolo says, today the summer officially arrives, and what could be more summery than these ridiculously cheerful and cheerfully ridiculous taffeta gingham platform sandals from the Miu Miu?

Too often are we required to wear serious clothing that conveys importance and sobriety. Too infrequently are we free to dress in ways that are expressive of joy.

It is summer, and we need the sort of happy-silly shoe that makes both the those who wear it and those who see it worn giddy with joy. Be joyful, wear happy shoes!

Super Miu Miu Starfish Tuesday!

Miu Miu Suede Starfish Sandals

Manolo says, here is something to brighten your day of laboring, the Miu Miu Suede Starfish Sandals.

And suddenly, just like that, you are transported to the shores of the Mediterranean Sea, to the charming little restaurant where the waiter named Aldo is bringing you the perfectly grilled prawns, with just the squeeze of lemon, which will go well with both the glass of local white wine, and that tall, sun-burnished man in the white shirt with the top two buttons open.

Miu Miu Glitter Pumps for the Tuesday

Manolo says it is Tuesday and you are back at your desk doing that thing…you know, that thing.. with the computer and the performance memos and the shouting boss who is the female version of the Lou Grant, all gruff on the outside, and but filled with the marshmallow creme on the inside (which, frankly, does not sound all that appealing, but at this stage of the career, you will take what you can get.)

Back in the day, when you were leaving the college and entering the force of working, you were so excited. It was like the adventure, to be earning your first paycheck, and you were the spunky, brave, beautiful heroine, the working-girl Cinderella, part debutant, part warrior queen.

…and now, after 20 years of the hard labor, you would settle with being recognized as one of Cinderella’s least unattractive step-sisters, the slightly prettier and less mean Drizella.

“Cindy, why don’t you go to the ball in my place. Don’t worry, I can take care of those fireplace ashes for you.”

And for the majority of us, no longer the protagonists in our own stories, this is the best for which we can hope: to be the attendant lady, one that will do to swell the progress, start the scene or two, advise the princess.

Sigh…

Look Beautiful fairy tale shoes, the Glitter Pumps from Miu Miu!

Miu Miu Glitter Pumps

Ayyyy! Perhaps the story is not yet written. Maybe this is just the lull between the acts, or the brief stutter step in the epitasis, and you are on the brink of the momentous change, and you will be forced to overcome impossible challenges and rise to your ultimate triumph!

Miu Miu Glitter & Suede Bow Peep-Toe Ankle Boots For the Monday

Manolo says, it is Monday, over halfway through the summer of your discontent, and frankly you feel as if you are trapped on the treadmill of life. Five days the week it is exactly the same thing, up and out the door to work, up and out the door to work, up and out the door to work… lather, rinse, and repeat.

Sadly, the weekends offer little respite from the repetitive drudgery of the week. On Saturday you must take care of the house, and do the laundry, and the shopping, and perhaps mow the lawn. Then Sunday, it is up and out the door to the church, followed by Sunday afternoon, the saddest part of the week, tainted as it is by the foreknowledge of what awaits you on the Monday morning.

Worse, on Sundays you are always made aware that this discontent you suffer is in vaguely immoral.

Indeed, in the church on Sunday morning, as you listened to the report from the mission team in South Sudan you knew just how lucky you were to be you. Any of those South Sudanese would instantly trade their flyblown huts and dung fires for your 2008 Toyota Camry, your colonial 3/2 in the suburbs, and your 40-hour-the-week job at the ImTechCom, Inc.

And yet, knowledge of your good fortune does little to make you feel better about how your life is going. Such is the modern world, no? Discontent and good fortune marching hand-in-hand.

Well, at the least there are beautiful and unusual shoes to take us out of ourselves for the briefest instant…

Miu Miu Glitter and Suede Bow Pumps

Unusual shoes such as the Glitter & Suede Bow Ankle Boots from Miu Miu, which surely must be the work of divine providence.

Miu Miu Patent Leather Mary Jane Pump for the Monday

Manolo says, it is Monday and you are back at your desk, and today you are ready to go! You woke up early, the fire for success in your belly, rumbling like the spicy burrito of accomplishment to come, pushing you forward to success.

Coffee! Coffee! Shower! Coffee! Clothes! Coffee! Go!

Must get to office to do that thing that will get you that promotion that will result in worldly success!

“Get out of the way,” you shout to the cars that are impeding you on the turnpike, “I have places to go, dammit!”

You arrive fifteen minutes early to the office, the testament to your diligence and can-do-it attitude. You leap from the automobile and race through the lobby, past the Ed the Security Guard.

“You go, missy!” he says genially to your back as you hit the elevator at the run.

“No time to talk, Ed,” You shout over your shoulder.

Up to the 6th floor, into your seat, boot up the computer, ignore the emails, and buckle down for the meaningful session of work. Ten minutes later the boss arrives, he nods his head, clearly happy to see you there at your desk.

Mission accomplished!

And now, you can click over to the real internet, to enjoy the first day of the week as is customary, by looking at gossip sites and beautiful shoes.

Miu Miu Patent Leather Mary Jane Pump

Look! Miu Miu Patent Leather Platform Mary Jane Pumps, with the bow!

Tassel-lations

While previously reserved for hanging off of graduation caps and stripper pasties, the tassel has become one of this seasons hottest fashion accents. Fringe has been dangling down the Spring/Summer runways at Gucci and Louis Vuitton in the form of earrings, necklaces, bags, and of course…shoes.

I think the tassel accent brings a playful energy to any footwear collection. We aren’t talking about what dangles off of your grandmothers couches or the rope that ties a small town’s community theater curtains together. This fringe is updated, fresh and aimed at your ankles.

Vena Cava Ankle Tie Platform

These Vena Cava Ankle-Tie Platforms feature white leather tassels. It’s like ornaments for your feet.

 

Jeffrey Campbell MaryLou Ivory

Perhaps you’re a fan of something a little more bold and adventurous? Check out these Jeffrey Campbell Mary-Lou Ivory Suede Wedge Bootie. With both suede front fringe panels and dangling tassels, these booties really take the trend into overdrive.

 

Miu Miu Woven Leather Platform

These Miu Miu Woven Leather Platforms are an interesting consolidation of many recent trends. The smooth leather tassels dangling from the braided canvas ties bring the multimedia look of the shoe together.

So next time you hear the word “tassel”, don’t think of the dangling distraction hanging from a high schooler’s used car rear-view mirror, but rather the fashionable accent swinging around this season.

Miu Miu Spectator Peep-Toe Mary Janes For the Monday

Manolo says, it is Monday and you are back at your desk working like the galley slave pulling at the oar while the boss-man “manages”, using his “motivational” cat-o-nine-tails.

Sigh.

Well at least there is the internet where your mind can run free, frolicking in the flowery fields of celebrity news!

Look! Rene Zelleweger is dating Anderson Cooper! And you think you have problems? Girlfriend has never been the same since the whole debacle with Kenny Chesney, who now admits he put his life into his closet, er box, whatever.

And then you cruise to the next site, and the next, and the next, and the mere fifteen minutes later you feel you are wallowing in tawdry gossip, indeed, you feel you need the long hot shower.

Or, perhaps, what you really need is…Shoes!

Sweet, simple, pure, innocent shoes, the container of goodness and beauty.

Look here from Miu Miu is the Specatator Peep-Toe Mary Janes.

Miu Miu Spectator Peep-Toe Mary Janes

And now, all is well.

Miu Miu Raso Sandal for the Monday

Miu Miu Raso Sandal    Manolo Likes!  Click!

Manolo says, after seeing so many super high shoes, this three inch heel Raso slingback sandal from Miu Miu seems somewhat restrained, this despite the refined exuberance of the bling-bling ornamentation. Simply put, it is gorgeous.

Miu Miu Tea Cup Platform Pumps

Miu Miu Tea Cup Platform Pumps   Manolo Does Not Care For  Click!Miu Miu Tea Cup Platform Pumps   Manolo Does Not Care For  Click!

Manolo says, maybe, possibly, if you were nine years old and playing the role of Belle in the production of “Beauty and the Beast.”

And yet, even as the Manolo mocks, he cannot deny that the shoe is made with beautiful materials, and is impeccably finished, even if it excessively childish.

Miu Miu Dumb Dumb

Miu Miu Kitten Heel Flex Pump with Flower ...  Manolo Thinks is Dumb.

Manolo says, it is not often the Manolo forcefully decries something from the hand of his muse, Miuccia Prada, but this kitten-heel flex pump from Miu Miu is just such the item.

There is no other way to describe this, except, it is just dumb.

Yes, undoubtedly in the wonderfully original and byzantine mind of Miuccia Prada, there is some sort of conceptual-y, ironic-y, post-modern-y thing going on, but here, in the execution of this idea, there is only dumbness.

This shoe could only be worn by the grossest of congenitally ignorant attention seekers. (Insert name of Hollywood starlet here.) Otherwise it is simply unwearable, and indeed, it pains the Manolo to even gaze upon it.

What is perhaps the most troubling for the Manolo is that only last week, the Manolo was praising one of the most beautiful shoes he has ever seen, the truly sublime Prada Corallo Oro sandals.

How is it possible that the same person could be responsible for both items?

And now, the Manolo must go lay down in the darkened room, the cool compress upon his forehead.

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