Manolo says, it is Tuesday and you are back at your office, wondering what has happened to the summer. You had such fun plans for the season, including the minor remodeling of the patio.

And then, in the first week of June, these plans was thrown into chaos by the sudden heatwave, when the triple-digit temperatures and the outrageous humidities kept you in the doors next to the air conditioner, watching televised golf and thinking about relocating to Seattle.

It was during this period of forced inactivity, when the plans for the patio metastasized into something much grander. (Let us stipulate that ordinary peoples should not be allowed access to graph paper and back issues of Sunset.)

Finally, when the weather cooled slightly, you began work on the new version of your outdoor living space.

And, so how has it gone?

Let us just say that the pile of bricks, bags of concrete mix, and the half-finished, combination outdoor-kitchen-and-adobe-pizza-oven-and-argentine-parilla which occupies much of the backyard are testimony to your pharaonic ambitions.

Who could have predicted that the bricklaying and the concrete-pouring would require such intense physical labor? Indeed, you have learned that such difficult things are best broken into manageable portions, which is why, at your current rate of production, the new patio should be completed sometime in July of 2044.

Ayyyy! What better way to wash away the bitter taste of failed home improvement projects than with beautiful and refined shoes?

Here is the lace and patent leather ankle booties from the Bottega Veneta, the sort of shoe that can only exist in the world in which skilled craftsmen can be hired to do and/or undo the things which we thought we could accomplish on our own!

Manolo says, here is the Manolo’s latest column for the Express of the Washington Post.

Dear Manolo,

What would you recommend for a 33-year-old mother of four very rambunctious boys? I want something that’s sporty, but also is a little hipper and less matronly than tennis shoes.

Lindsay

Manolo says, what would the Manolo recommend? Boarding school!

Ha! The Manolo jokes!

Actually, seeing the young peoples with the large families always makes the Manolo happy, for they recall to him his own blissful childhood as the next-to-the-youngest of fourteen tatterdemalion gypsy children.

Such joy in numbers! Never did the teeny Manolo have to wait for his mother, Maria Jesus de Carmen, to arrange for him the “playdate” with the coddled child with the strangely Scottish first name, such as MacKenzie, or McIntosh, or McDuff. No, there was always someone available to kick the ball, or skip the rope, or catch the lizards and dress them in the little tin foil shoes which the Manolo had designed for them.

Of the course, the family of the Manolo was not rich. And more than once the fourteen children of the Maria Jesus de Carmen and the Gustavo went to bed without the meal. But such privations are nothing compared to the joy the Manolo experienced on those infrequent days when it was finally his turn to wear the family pair of shoes!

Manolo says, the driving moccasins should be the staple in the wardrobe of any stylish woman. Here is the Kenna driving moccasin from Ecco in the burnt orange color. It is also available in the seasonally appropriate “crispy white”.

Manolo asked, whose shoes?

Manolo answers, it is the Tilda Swinton!

Congratulations to the Manolo’s internet friend, the Stella, who was the first to guess this week’s oddity of note.

Manolo asks, whose shoes?

If any of the Manolo’s British internet friend are in the market for the women’s designer shoes, they should consider looking at the Daniel Footwear, the online shoe shop with the excellent service and the good prices.

Here are two such shoes…

The Irena platform from the Pour la Victoire.

Also, this remarkable, burgundy mid-wedge shoe from the Tory Burch.

And, their own house brand, the Daniel shoes are very much worthy of your attention.

Manolo says, look what has appeared on the electronic desktop of the Manolo: the Spring/Summer 2012 collection from the Manolo’s exceedingly talented designer friend, the Abel Muñoz!

Here is the inspiration of the collection.

The Spring Summer 2012 collection is inspired by the women of Rimini, a place
known as a mecca for high fashion, rich culture, and a vibrant summer lifestyle.
Each style utilizes extravagant, bright, bold colors combined with cutting edge
design. Women from all walks of life become goddesses unleashing an unstoppable
energy that celebrates freedom and independence.

And now, here are three of the Manolo’s favorites from this auspicious collection:

The Batman-esque detail around the eyelets of this shoe, the Ersila, is one of the many things that elevates this oxford pump well above the ordinary.

Manolo shouts….zzzzzzap! The Elettra’s bright red lightning bolt commands the attention of Zeus (a.k.a, that broad-chested, six-footer with the full beard who delivers the drinking water bottles (two at the time!) to your office.

To the mind of the Manolo the Mirella is the most Rimini of all of the shoes in the collection, something that would be worn as one strides across the Piazza Tre Martiri, earning the admiration of the gentlemen sipping their Camparis in the cafes along the edge.

The only bad thing about this collection is that it will not arrive until the next year…but, as they say, the good things, they are worth the wait.

Manolo says, here is the Manolo’s latest column for the Express of the Washington Post.

Dear Manolo,

I’m starting the 9th grade in a couple of weeks and my new school doesn’t allow sandals or open-toed shoes. My mom won’t let me wear heels to school, and all of my tennis shoes and ballet flats are boring. What’s popular right now?

Haley

Manolo says, oh, how the Manolo remembers his own first day at his alma mater, the Our Lady of the Flaming Spleen Country Day School (whose motto remains “The Wrathful Word Turneth Away Evil”).

The day began auspiciously, with the young Manolo strolling onto campus two minutes late, just as Sister Assumpta was chasing the tardy students from the schoolyard into the building, welding her yardstick as if she were Samson slaying the Philistines with the jawbone of the ass.

Ayyy! The Manolo still bears the marks of that first lesson in punctuality!

Of the course, it was not all fun and games at OLFSCDS. Education always took precedence over the various social clubs and sporting teams. Indeed, who could forget the time Eduardo Castro, our greatest competitor, failed the algebra test and was suspended from our rosary team, just as they were about to compete for the regional championships against the cross town rival, Holy Relic?

It was then that the Manolo, who had been “riding the pine” all season, was put into the starting lineup. And, in the moment of supreme triumph, he helped bring home the trophy with his flawless rendition of the most difficult Fatima Decade!

What is in this year? Strangely, it is the Sperry Topsider! Here is the Angelfish in the linen and the oat.

Manolo asked, whose shoes?

Manolo answers, it is the Sheryl Crow!

Congratulations to the Manolo’s internet friend, the Candelaria, who was the first to correctly identify this week’s personage of note.

Manolo asks, whose shoes?

N.B. Our friend The Legatrix is back with advice about the summer-time party shoes.

‘Tis the season for outdoor parties, which invariably provokes harrowing shoe angst in me. I love the great outdoors. Really I do. They’re a lovely place to sprawl out with a good book and a Nalgene bottle full of mint juleps. But Mother Nature has a long-burning vendetta against me. Try as I may to be prepared for whatever gravel pits, mudslides, and rivers of lava she may throw in my path, I never seem to be wearing the right shoes.

This became painfully clear at a splendiferous wedding that I attended in the Hungarian countryside last month. Guests were treated to abundant wine, whole roast mammals, flitting cherubs, and gamboling fawns. The bride, ever attentive to her friends’ collective fabulosity, even had wooden walkways lain in the fields so people could walk comfortably from place to place. This worked marvelously until the walkways got wet and turned into a network of Slip n’ Slides.

By now I think you can see where this is going. . . two broken sandals and a solicitous Hungarian peasant boy later, I sorely lamented my choice of footwear.

The difficulty with picking shoes for outdoor events is that your footwear must be practical and adaptable to all sorts of terrain. That means no heels unless you’re out to aerate someone’s lawn. Bigger trouble still is that your footwear often winds up looking eminently functional. So here are a few shoe selections that are practical, adaptable and elegant. . . and even a couple with a little altitude built in.

Swoosie, by Kate Spade, will keep your feet firmly planted on terra firma with arch support often lacking in strappy little sandals. Plus, they’re adorned with little golden grape clusters.

And Oona, by Loeffler Randall, would be perfect with those white wide-legged trousers you have. You know, the ones that make your legs look a mile long. Those trousers.

Finally, Jean, by Stuart Weitzman, is the perfect combination of polished and relaxed elements. I usually get a little queasy at the sight of cork heels. But these are so pitch perfect that you don’t have to worry about looking like the sort of leather-textured woman who molests cabana boys with coconut oil.

Now go outside and play!

Manolo says, it is Monday and you are back doing that thing…you know…that thing with the work. And here it is the first of August, and you have officially entered the doggish days of summer, when the oppressive heat and the vacations of the co-workers mean that everything is extra quiet.

You need to enliven your afternoon with some tasty fashion, such a these Metallic and Suede Sandals from the Jerome Rousseau

Manolo says, here is the Manolo’s latest column for the Express of the Washington Post.

Dear Manolo,

I need help with a major wardrobe decision. Over the past year, I’ve lost nearly 80 pounds, and have finally reached my goal weight of 135. Naturally, I need an entirely new set of clothes. The weirdest thing, however, is that my feet have also shrunk, between a half and a full shoe size. They’ve even gotten narrower! So I need new shoes. I want something sexy and strappy and suitable for dancing the night away. Please help.

Lisa

Manolo says, the Manolo’s friend Lisa is to be congratulated on her accomplishment, as losing the unnecessary weight is truly one of the hardest things in the world to do.

Indeed, the Manolo, himself, has long struggled with his own poor genetics and powerful appetites. He was not blessed with the long, thin, elegant silhouette which has been the fashion in the West since the medieval times. Nor is the Manolo one of those people who can subsist on barley water and bran rusks, preferring in the stead, savory roasts and vegetables in the cream sauces.

And thus, if asked to describe his own current figure, the Manolo would answer, “somewhat thickish around the middle” (although the judges would also have accepted “Falstaffian”).

Sigh.

Thank goodness for the custom tailoring and the male foundation garments!

Look! Here is the Lightning from the Stuart Weitzman, the sexy sandal with which to dance away the night.