Project Runway 3, Week 4
Manolo says, this week the previews for the Project Runway they promised much entertainment as someone was to be pitched from the show. And, indeed, someone was pitched from the show, the Keith who was unceremoniously shown to the exit by the Tim Gunn, in the full the Dean of the College mode.
The Manolo is sorry to see this happen. First he is sorry to see the Keith sent packing as he was not only the very talented designer (his dress in the doggy challenge it was absolutely beautiful), but also the Keith he was becoming the perfect villain; arrogant, cool, back-biting, handsome, egocentric, talented, willing to break the rules to advance himself. The perfect dramatic foil to the others, and now, like the Malan, he is gone and will be terribly missed.
Of the course, to the Manolo, much worse than being sent away, was being sent away for such the trivial matter, and so undramatically. There was no build up to the moment, just Kayne crying like the titty-baby tattletale because he had found the pattern books, and then the Head Master Tim appearing at the door to send the bad boy down from school.
Think how much better this episode would have been if the Keith, he had really done something evil, like attempting to slowly poison the other contestants with the strychnine. Now, that would have been the television worth the watching!
As for the challenge of the week, in the word: Meh.
Design the mildly trendy, but not too challenging outfit that may be mass retailed to the poor girls who must slave in the offices. You have three of the American dollars to spend on material.
And thus, we the humble viewers were once again given the teams, and watched as they produced the art by committee, turning out the bland and blah outfits that would not be out of place in the Jacqueline Smith collection at the Kmart.
At the least, the super fantastic Michael (the Manolo’s new favorite) and Laura, (she of the sternum that could cut glass) restrained the wickety-wacking ways of the Angela, to produce the short jackety-panty outfit that captured the Macys’ INC gestalt perfectly. To which the Manolo would reply, Ho-Hum.
Not even the appearance of Howie Mandel in the cameo as the Macys’ Man could enliven the proceedings.
As for the judging, please, please, please, Micheal Kors come home. You are needed now more than ever.
Special Project Runway Bonus Question: If you were to be forced to have your neck tattooed, at the gun point, what would you have put on there? Extra credit if it includes the name of the major midwestern American city.
August 3rd, 2006 at 11:59 am
Manolo,
Pardon me for a correction? I think your second “Laura” is meant to be “Angela” (see below). Love your column! Cindy
“At the least, the super fantastic Michael (the Manolo’s new favorite) and Laura, (she of the sternum that could cut glass) restrained the wickety-wacking ways of the Laura…”
August 3rd, 2006 at 12:01 pm
I thought it was only $100 to spend on fabric.
I, too, was disappointed at the lack of draaaaammmmmaaa. Kayne is a big ol’ femme-narc. But Keith non-apology apology was fab. He will do great things, I predict.
Michael is my new boyfriend, and I think I would have his name tattooed on my neck.
If I had to.
And the gunpoint.
August 3rd, 2006 at 12:03 pm
Uh, that should have been “Keith’s” and “at the gunpoint.”
The Lisa, she needn’t type so fast.
August 3rd, 2006 at 12:35 pm
I personally hoped for a Scooby Doo moment where Keith pulls off his mask to reveal an angry Vera Wang sneering, “And I would have gotten away with it too if it weren’t for you meddling kids!”
August 3rd, 2006 at 12:45 pm
Alas, Manolo, I think you are wrong to call Kayne “titty-baby”- Keith ruined his own chances and his own reputation, not anyone else. Wouldn’t you try to stop someone who was cheating to get an advantage over you?
August 3rd, 2006 at 1:00 pm
Yes, if you listen to the superfantastic Tim Gunn’s podcast, Keith didn’t just break one rule, he broke THREE. It’s hard to ignore at that point. He beat out thousands of people to get on the show. I have no sympathy for the Keith.
August 3rd, 2006 at 1:09 pm
Argh! I was so disappointed by the lack of drama! The previews were so much more entertaining to watch than the actual episode. Keith was a super-villain, and he will be missed because of all the fantastic drama he stirred up. But rules are rules, and he admitted himself that he broke tons of them. And that doesn’t even include the deal with his portfolio that he submitted to the show…
I agree with Monolo, that Michael and Laura are the best ones now. They never cease to come up with amazing designs, very classy.
August 3rd, 2006 at 1:35 pm
The Keith refused to dress the little doggie. (Oh, so cute little doggie. Rare and precious little doggie. We loves our little precious, but not in doll clothes.)
The Keith cheated with Mood, when he wheedled a discount for going over budget.
The Keith left the premises without a hall pass, and cruised the internets for…inspiration? patterns?
The Keith had cheat sheets.
The Keith had a Very Bad Attitude, of the Draco Malfoy variety.
Miz Shoes, she was not sorry to see the Keith go. But she, like the Manolo, wishes very much that the final four designs had been worth staying up to watch. An ANORAK? Who are we kidding? And the Mork & Mindy cowl collar? And the crotch straps on the Jeffrey/Alison top? What the heck was that?
August 3rd, 2006 at 1:44 pm
Ayyyyy! The C.D. is correct, the Manolo meant to say, “Angela”, not the “Laura”. Many thanks for pointing this error out to him.
August 3rd, 2006 at 1:52 pm
Detriot is a most frightening city without having itself slathered across the thick neck of some CromagnoPunkMan. I would pick Akron.
August 3rd, 2006 at 1:55 pm
I also agree with the Manolo’s assessment of Kayne. Instead of letting Keith hang himself - what with the trips and the suspicious internet activities - Kayne made himself look bad. If he so felt the need to tattle, he should have done it quietly rather than gossiping to everyone first. Cindy
August 3rd, 2006 at 1:55 pm
Of course you could throw in some grillz and tattoo “St. Lunatics” across your neck.
Personally, I’d get “Don’t Hassel the Hoff”…wouldn’t that be lovely in cursive on one’s neck?
August 3rd, 2006 at 2:09 pm
Design the mildly trendy, but not too challenging outfit that may be mass retailed to the poor girls who must slave in the offices. You have three of the American dollars to spend on material.
Oh Manolo, you slay me! I also thought Bravo was pretty stingy with the money this week. I guess Macy’s needs to make sure the outfit can be produced for 78 cents in a sweatshop? Gosh.
August 3rd, 2006 at 2:27 pm
Ah Manolo, you could not have said it more super fantastic.
Kayne managed to steal all of Keith’s thunder, and while part of that is because Keith was given very little airtime during which to make the grand scene I was hoping for, the majority of it was Kayne’s need to justify his whining. That the justification for whining was more whining did not help his image, I think.
As for the winning outfit, well, Tim’s Take probably said it better than I could. Michael (he of the superfab) and Laura (she of the superclav.) tamed the beast in the end, and it took less than 10 rosettes to do it.
August 3rd, 2006 at 2:37 pm
I think the episode was totally anti-climatic. And while I was not necessarily looking for the slow torturous poisoning (like the Manolo), I was expecting something with a little more drama than a couple of pattern books shoved under the bed, or even sneaking off to use the internet.
The challenge was dull as dishwater too. I expected so much more from my favorite Barbie designer. And when will we see more of Michael other than being part of a team, much less a team led by the queen of rosettes?
Since Ms Zoe if from Minneapolis, I’d go with the abbreviated version (Mpls ) as I should think needles with ink in the neck region would hurt enormously so the less letters the better.
August 3rd, 2006 at 2:44 pm
I am shocked that a Barbie costume designer would come up with a dull-as-dishwater outfit. Such a disappointment! In contrast, I love Michael and Laura more each week!
August 3rd, 2006 at 3:05 pm
Yes, the Keith was an excellent super-villain, but a much too predictable one for my tastes. I prefer the nitroglycerine-like tension produced by wondering exactly when, where, and with how big a bang Vincent goes off. The Vincent, he is the Ticking Time Bomb! Here’s hoping the contestants had to turn in all their weaponry as well as their pattern books…
August 3rd, 2006 at 3:23 pm
Now dears, before you go too far with your Kayne-hating, read “Andy’s Blog” on Bravo with Keith’s comments about his auffing- wherein he says it was Jeffrey who turned him in, not Kayne…
August 3rd, 2006 at 3:32 pm
Why isn’t there a programme about cats? Where we design collars?
August 3rd, 2006 at 4:59 pm
Fear not, Manolo. The Michael Kors, he will be back next week. I saw it in the promos and the end of last night’s show.
August 3rd, 2006 at 8:59 pm
Keith was a good villain, but I was glad to see him go. I found his holier-than-thou attitude a bit too much, particularly when he whined after the dress-the-dog challenge that he didn’t understand why he didn’t win. I don’t know, perhaps because you didn’t follow instructions!
It was clear that he skirted several rules, as well as breaking some, so the interest of fairness, he was rightfully given the boot.
I was so happy to see more of Michael - his pants were awesome, and I loved seeing him and Laura talking about the rosettes of their fearless leader. Angela owes her win to them.
All hail the return of Michael Kors next week!
August 3rd, 2006 at 9:05 pm
If coerced, the tattoo would say “Open other end.” -r.
August 4th, 2006 at 1:16 am
While the Twistygirl loves the Manolo and genuflects at his feets, she must respectfully disagree about the dismissal of Keith. Twistygirl is very happy to see the sociopathic Ted Bundy of Fashion go.
Twistygirl is worried for the Robert and hopes he gets his Barbielicious act together. How did the trench coat he showed to the Howie Mandel become the hideous parka?
Twistygirl is lovin’ the Michael more and more each week. NEW ABSOLUTE FAVORITE! Hippity-hop Michael, he of the sublime construction and the saucy crunk wit. Twistygirl wants the Michael to be her Project Runway boyfriend for this year, just like the Daniel V was her PR boyfriend last year!
SPECIAL BONUS QUESTION ANSWER: Because Twistygirl thinks she is the hoochie rap star and not the pasty-faced social worker she actually is, she would have “THUG LIFE” tatooed on her neck in the letters of the Olde English, just like the Tupac (R.I.P. you superfantastic man) had on his tummy. And for Midwestern Cities, Twistygirl would probably put “Saginaw,” just because it’s such a stupid thing to put permanently on the pasty neck.
August 4th, 2006 at 3:56 am
Dear Manolo, you make my day! My two DDs and I thought the drama with Keith rather a let-down, too. The DDs, they were super pumped for this episode! We were voting for the Angela and just damn if she didn’t win! (Uh..with a little help from the super fantastic Laura and Michael). Now our collective malevolenct hatred will have to be focused on the Jeffrey and his frightening tattoo. I knew Michael was special from the git-go when he did the coffee filter dress.
AS for the tattoo on the neck, I think not.
August 4th, 2006 at 8:22 am
Ah, fare-thee-well to the Keith, and don’t let the door hit you in your [insert Laura’s spot on description of Keith after his departure here] on the way out. If the Malan was the Voldemort Lite, Keith is the Draco Malfoy Dark (thanks to Miz Shoes for that reference!). All snarky smug self-satisfaction, and it’s always everyone else’s fault. I do wish they had devoted more time to having Tim tell what all the infractions were. His podcast was fascinating. There was clearly way more drama that got left on the editing room floor.
August 4th, 2006 at 9:25 am
I would have liked to watch Keith for a couple more episodes. I completely agree with C.D. that Keith was already tying his own noose with his bad attitude. I was also dissapointed with the shameless false- advertising of a dramatic, “boot up the rear” dismissal from the show. Not even the challenge could redeem the flop. Perhaps a more super fantastic option would have been for everyone design their own backwoods trashy-punk tattoo to grace the necks of American women- courtesy of Walmart.
August 4th, 2006 at 10:00 am
Drama = snitty Michael Kors. Where is he?
Class = Tim Gunn. You can be my headmaster any day Tim!
And while I’m doing algebra: Laura + Michael = Even Angela can produce a passable garment!
And I was shocked to see Jeffrey with his shirt off. He doesn’t have any other tattoos! I figured that if he had NECK tattoos for godssake that his torso would be covered, but nope… it’s only that ridiculous collar. Talk about wikety-wack!
August 4th, 2006 at 10:03 am
When I watched the show, I saw a commercial for INC with ladies in summer dresses walking down a runway — and I thought it was a Geico ad. Seriously, I thought it was a joke. The dresses were cute but uber-plain.
As for the neck tatoo– I’ve always wanted to get something completely innapropriate in Japanese, like “coca-cola”, but in Japanese letters. That would be perfect for a neck tattoo.
August 4th, 2006 at 10:47 am
The drama on the Runway this year will be the budding romance between Kayne and Robert, and how that will be destroyed as the competition continues. Keith reminded us of the Ian Somerhalder charachter in the trashy movie “Rules of Attraction” and for all his faults, he will be missed.
As for the tattoo, something that initially sounds scary, but is actually quite ridiculous: Scarsdale.
August 4th, 2006 at 1:15 pm
As for the tattoo: a noose.
August 4th, 2006 at 2:25 pm
“Detroit” is his little girl’s name … Don’t forget “Winona” … (but I’ve also got middle-aged women friends who were christened “Mary Tulsa” and “Mary Dallas” by normal Southern parents. My friends aren’t normal, so they go by “Tulsa” and “Dallas”, of the course.)
For bonus points (at gunpoint) I’d opt for “Peoria”.
Would it also make my neck look very, very large and my head look very, very small?
August 4th, 2006 at 2:43 pm
Twistygirl forgot to also say that she is so happy that the Michael Kors returns next week! Our long national nightmare, it is over!!
August 4th, 2006 at 10:36 pm
ah, manolo, i too think the kayne was a bit of a titty baby and it will surely come back to haunt him!
however, the keith, he did not play by the rules!
now, to the scooby doo ending hoped for by the bin…that will certainly come my friend as the bradley strikingly resembles the shaggy!!!! however, the michael kors will pull off the mask! joy! rapture!
and week after next, oh the angela will leave in a shower of rosettes!!!
August 5th, 2006 at 7:55 am
Sad indeed are the outfits of this season. The drama is too pushed, the promos too forced. That said, Keith deserved to slink off into snivling oblivion for his cheating ways. If you want to be a bad guy, dear Keith, own it. You have failed as the super villan I hoped you would be and sorely let me down.
August 5th, 2006 at 8:22 am
SPECIAL BONUS QUESTION ANSWER: “Detroit” - a city that perfectly encapsulates the post-industrial apocalypse.
August 5th, 2006 at 8:33 am
Perhaps next week we’ll get more than 18 seconds of Michael. Alas, I dream…
August 5th, 2006 at 9:13 am
His tattoo used to really bother me until I saw in People that Jeffrey’s tattoo actually reads “Harrison Detroit” (his son’s name) and “the love of my life” in Latin (I think) - and that it took 8 hours. He just really loves his kid - so now I don’t mind the tattoo much. (Although it does make his neck look exceedingly wide.)
August 5th, 2006 at 9:47 am
More Michael! More Michael!
What ever happened to Austin from season 1? He was my favorite.
August 5th, 2006 at 5:36 pm
I agree with kat. Once the Angela is on her own again and doesn’t have the guidance of the amazing and superfantastic Michael and Laura she will be history. I only hope the Michael Kors he is there to do the honors.
August 5th, 2006 at 9:21 pm
The Gidget thinks that if the person is going to name the child “Detroit,” and then have the same tattooed on the person’s neck, the only proper first name for the child is Nathan. The Gidget loves the “Guys and Dolls.”
Meanwhile the Gidget, she is a fan of the Jeffrey, the unloved tattooed underdog.
The Keith, he of the many excuses and rationalizations, is not missed.
August 6th, 2006 at 9:27 am
As desertwind points out, the neck tattoo would make the neck appear very, very large and the head very, very small.
It is my opinion that the unfortunate neck tattoo was applied to detract from the fact that the Jeffrey’s chin, it is weak and without definition. Such a tattoo is ill-advised and makes for the ridicule of the person who suffers from the no-chin, small-head, large-neck syndrome. So very sad. So very comical.
August 6th, 2006 at 1:23 pm
I adore the Manolo. If I had to have a tattoo at gunpoint (cause that’s the only way it’s going to happen), I’d have “Oskaloosa” put on my neck. (That’s in Iowa people)
August 6th, 2006 at 4:03 pm
Ahhh.
Yet another blog board I am growing to love.
I totally agree with everything you said.
The episode was very blahhhhhh
and the clothing even blahhher.
As for the bonus question:
I’ll get O-HI-O.
with 20 rosettes tatted on my neck.
in ode to Angela “Granny Circle” K.
[though i loathe her]
August 6th, 2006 at 4:45 pm
1st time poster, long time reader….hello all!
Anyway, the midwest town tattoo is easy. My hometown and present living vicinity….Cincinnati! Of course, I don’t have this much neck! LOL
Nathan Detroit….you folks slay me…that cracked me up for several minutes.
As for The Keith, all I will say is that if he can do that well just from studying books for a short amount of time, imagine what he can do when he really gets the knack of womenswear?! Too bad for him that he blew this chance and so publicily at that. Tho I don’t think this is the end for him, by no means. I fully expect to hear from him and Malan in the future.
The Kayne hasn’t a prayer of winning even w/ Keith gone. I understand why he did what he did, but I do think he might end up paying for it the way whistleblowers usually do. The backstory that goes w/ this story is so complicated and CYA, but I find it interesting that the editors chose to give The Kayne the doubious honor of being The Whistleblower……..methinks that bodes not well for our favorite pagaent designer.
Golly I miss last season….and I’d tholught I’d be over that by now.
August 6th, 2006 at 5:51 pm
I’d have a dotted line across the middle with, in tiny print “Cut Along This Line” and a little picture of a scissor along the dotted line. LIke on a packet of shredded cheese.
August 6th, 2006 at 8:45 pm
Perhaps large black GOTHIC lettering and a bigger neck:
CHICAGO,the windy city, the historic location of the child’s birth, the place where in an e x t e n d e d moment following 24 hours of labor and 18 years of child rearing I just plain forgot to run out and have this tattooed all over the neck to notify all who care to look just how IMPORTANT the child is!
Or maybe something in a tasteful victorian script…
August 6th, 2006 at 11:15 pm
I was sure the person who would be kicked out would vandalize other outfits. Pattern books? The lame!
August 7th, 2006 at 8:00 am
I’m hoping that there will be a new villain in town since this episode produced the let-down of the anticlimax.
Only at gunpoint I would have the words ‘I had a gun at my head but not in Muncie’ because there is no way that the font size could be very big. I don’t see this neck ink situation happening anytime real soon as I avoid damanding gun-toting tattoo artists whenever possible.
August 7th, 2006 at 8:52 am
I thought Keith was going to be kicked off because he had STOLEN several designs in his audition portfolio. (In fact, his “sketches” actually look like he just put the photos through the Poster Edges filter in Photoshop). Now THAT would have made for some extra drama! I guess the producers didn’t want it to be publicly known that they hadn’t caught the plagiarism in the audition phase.
August 7th, 2006 at 8:59 am
How about… “Milwaukee’s Best”. but done just like the beer label. Classy.
August 7th, 2006 at 10:42 pm
Tattoo: Pittsburgh: childhood home of Andy Warhol, Gertrude Stein, August Wilson, and Gene Kelly. (Dan Marino for extra neck credit.)
Keith didn’t seem all that original a villain to moi. I found him exhausting and drippy rather than entertaining.
As for the challenges, could we please have one that involves large dogs or bodacious sized ladies, neither of them accessories?
August 8th, 2006 at 12:48 am
The neck tattoo at gunpoint involving a Midwest city? Oh, that’s easy. “CHICAGO STUD.” Block sans-serif lettering, of course.
August 8th, 2006 at 9:43 am
Ah the Tim Gunn, he is amazing is he not? I too was disapointed at the lack of drama in this episode, the reason for being knocked off the show was almost laughable.
August 8th, 2006 at 10:26 am
I would have the beautiful countenance of the Liam Gallagher of Oasis tatooed on any part of my person. Gun or no gun. I am from Cincinnati Ohio..and your point is?
August 8th, 2006 at 1:29 pm
Martha - the Twistygirl is originally from the Burgh of the Pitts, and would like to add Frances McDormand and Trent Reznor to your list of the peoples who grew up in the delightful city of the Three Rivers! The Twistygirl went to high school with the neices and nephews of the Warhol and the Twistygirl’s dearly departed mother used to work with the also dearly departed Andy Warhol! But the Twistygirl will always argue that the Burgh of the Pitts is not truly the Midwest, for you can not buy cheese curds there.
August 8th, 2006 at 3:28 pm
Dearest Twisty: I do feel the Steel City love! I, too, attended school with a female Warhola, grew up down the street from Andy’s high school. (And a friend of mine went to church camp with La McDormand.) My mother, Martha Sr., still lives in the Burgh, and in fact, the sign on her street reads: “Oakland–childhood home of Dan Marino and Andy Warhol.” You can also find a bench dedicated to my mama, a living saint, in the park across the street from the Library of Carnegie. She once looked for an apartment under the guidance of Jeff Goldblum’s older, larger brother (think Harvey Fierstein in white clogs), and lived to tell the tale. We must dish Pitt sometime.
I agree–cheese curds do not abound in the burgh. But chipped ham? Overfloweth.
August 10th, 2006 at 2:58 am
Now, I did miss the episode, but by listening to Tim’s podcast, I’m under the impression that Bonnie is out, in addition to Keith’s boot off the show. Why is it that her departure hasn’t been mentionned by anyone here? Am I wrong in thinking that she’s out, or has she just been forgotten?
As for a neck tattoo, at the gunpoint, I would probably get a vampire bite.
August 25th, 2006 at 10:43 am
I would get Tim Gunn tattooed on my neck…With “Make it work!” in gangsta style Old English.
A midwestern city: Kenosha.