Winker Jeans

Manolo says, behold! Perhaps the single worst ass-o-centric fashion idea since Victoria’s Secret printed the work “Pink” on the back of their shorty-shorts.

They are called Winker Jeans.

There’s something just a bit disturbing about this: Jeans that wink as you walk.

They’re Winker Jeans, nicknamed Winkers. The imprinted eyes on the butt wink at anybody following the wearer. And how thrilling, they’re made in America, the brainchild of William Jones, a retired father of five and grandfather of seven who lives in Everett, WA.

You can smell the excitement at the company headquarters, whose website declares, “Patent pending,” and hot diggity, “Licensing Is Available!

Jones says that the idea came to him when, naturally, he was checking out a woman as she walked past him. Nice. Grampa’s a dirty old man.

His range isn’t limited to just eyes, though. The imprints include ducks that seem to quack, an owl that blinks, a Lion King jungle scene, and a scene slates that you snap on the set when the direct yells, “Action!”

Cost for a pair of jeans: $569 each.

$569!! Is that in American dollars? Ayyyyy!

Thankfully, these are too expensive to be purchased by those who would likely wear them, although, if the price comes down substantially, look for them in the Wal-Mart nearest you.

P.S. Many thanks to the Manolo’s internet friend CBHutton for alerting the Manolo to this abomination.

Whose Shoes Wednesday

Manolo asks, whose shoes?