Manolo says, the Snooki, she is not just the cultured lady-thing who drinks her herbal tea with the pinkie finger extended, she is also now the published author person!
Snooki once told a reporter for the NY Times that she’d only read two books in her life, Dear John and Twilight. The orange wonder can add one more book to that list, because her new work of “fiction,” A Shore Thing, is out in stores today. […] The book is about a character named “Gia,” who is basically Snooki, and her cousin, who rent a “Seaside Heights beach house/dump” over the summer and try to get laid.
Ayyyy! It sounds like something by D.H. Lawrence!
Of the course, we must now look at the excerpt of this debut masterwork, The Shore Thing.
A hot guido was staring at her – in a nice way – from across the room.
Gia smiled at him. His back against the wall, he stood just off the dance floor, thumb in a belt loop. His chest muscles strained the fabric of his black tank top. It fit across a tummy that was hard and flat enough to cut salami on. No tattoos, which meant plenty of empty space on his arms to ink PROPERTY OF GIA. He started as if he could see through her dress, right down to the zebra-print bra and thong set underneath.
“I found him,” Gia said to Bella, draining her Slippery Nipple in one long suck…
The Manolo was right! It is exactly like D.H. Lawrence, only with less swarthy gamekeepers, and more swarthy guidos!
But wait, it gets better…
Manolo says, the twelfth day of Christmas approaches, which for many peoples of the Manolo’s acquaintance means it is time to take down the Christmas tree. Our friend Christa, at the Green Manolo, has some of the suggestions…
Put it in the trash? No way, that’s for amateurs. Recycling the Christmas tree? Now that’s what I’m talking about.