Christian Louboutin Balota Glitter Sandals for the Monday

Manolo says, it is Monday and you doing whatever it is you are doing on the Day of the American President, and frankly either way, you are feeling somewhat worn out.

Is it the spring yet?

This interminable winter of discontentment has been sapping you of your vital essence, and now you are in the danger of becoming the mere husk of your formerly robust and vibrant self.

What can get you through this depressing period of snow and seasonally affective disordering?

Shoes!

What else can lift our spirits so reliably when they are flagging?

Christian Louboutin Balota Glitter Strappy Sandals

Here is the Balota Glittery Leather Strappy Sandals from the Christian Louboutin, the sort of wonderfully luxurious shoe that would make even the darkest winter day as bright as the summer sun.

Christian Louboutin Pigalle Plato Patent Leather Pumps For the Day of San Valentine

Manolo says, it is the Day of San Valentine and you are back at your desk thinking it is the no big deal. Although, as you say this to yourself, you know perfectly well that if your man fails to come across with the goods this evening the day will end on the note of sourness.

And what are these “goods” of which you speak?

If you were honest with yourself, you would say the absolute best would be the hand-written letter of love, in which your husband of many years produces poetry which will rival that of the Robert Herrick.

But, it seems unlikely that the same man who yesterday changed the oil on your car and then spent six hours on the couch in the basement watching college basketball, would be suddenly graced with greatness by the immortal muses.

Indeed, somewhere in the attic, secreted away in your chest of treasures, reside the examples of Gary’s previous poetic efforts, written when you were both young and in the first flush of love. As you recall, the word “forsooth” figures prominently in them.

And so, as the years have progressed, you have readjusted the definition of the “goods” downward, in inverse proportion to gifts required for the anniversary of the wedding. In anniversary terms, the first year is paper, the fiftieth is gold. In Valentine’s Day terms, the first is florid original poetry hand-written on parchment, the fiftieth is that he remembers your name as he gums his heart-shaped bowl of tapioca.

You are now at the stage midway between these two poles, which means that if Gary wishes to remain in good odor, he will fork over the large card into which he has handwritten the words “I Love You”, along with the box of decent chocolate and/or the bouquet of roses. He will then complete the evening with the dinner at the House of the Outback Steak, where he not wait for dessert to express his undying love to you, but will utter such words no latter than the moment when the remains of the Blooming Onion are cleared away.

And so it is written, and so it shall be.

Look!

Beautiful sexy red shoes from the Christian Louboutin!

Pigalle Plato Patent Leather Platform Pumps by Christian Louboutin

It is the Pigalle Plato Patent Leather Platform Pumps. Red shoes to impress the crowd at the Red Lobster!

Christian Louboutin Salsbourg Strappy Sandal For the Monday

Manolo says, it is Monday and you are back at your desk losing the forest for the trees. But such is the nature of the modern life in which the pursuit of perceived happiness frequently results in actual and active unhappiness.

In such situations it does well for one to remember that not only do we not live in the Panglossian world of housebroken puppies and strawberry gumdrops, where everything always works out for the best, but that sadness and discontent and suffering are part of the human inheritance.

It is the small comfort.

But then, things get better or they do not. You will be happy again, or you will not. Seek solace where you can, in the writings of Epictetus, or the Psalms, or P.G. Wodehouse.

January is almost over, is it not?

Look! Beautiful shoes…

Christian Louboutin Salsbourg Metallic Leather Strappy Sandal

Salsbourg Metallic Strappy Sandals from the inimitable Christian Louboutin. Such thing of beauty go the long way to making our lives more bearable.

The Fakes, They are Never in the Fashion

Manolo says, the Manolo’s friends at the Harper’s Bazaar have launched the new website drawing attention to the scourge of designer fakery: Fakes are Never in Fashion.

Harper’s Bazaar’s Fakes Are Never In Fashion™ initiative has been working for years to expose the criminal activities connected to the sales of counterfeit products. The sales from these fake products fund child labor, sweat shops, drug cartels and even terrorism. American companies also lose an estimated $20 billion from the counterfeit goods industry.

The Harper’s Bazaar peoples have even included good advice for avoiding the fake shoes.

Fake Christian Louboutin Shoes

Phoney Baloney, Plastic Fake, Not Christian Louboutin Shoes

    * Location – Luxury designer shoes are never sold by a street vendors, flea markets or low end stores. Buy from authorized retailers. These can easily be found on the brand’s website by looking at the locations the product is sold.
    * Inspect The Bottom – Many fake shoes come with a thin plastic film attached to the bottom of the shoe. No luxury designer would put out a product with plastic covering.
    * An Inside Job – Many counterfeit boots are created with cheaper interior materials. Instead of the shoe being lined with suede or leather, the fakes are lined with a much more noticeable, cheaper fabric.
    Seams & Stitching – Crooked, poor stitching or messy seams, on Sheepskin boots for example, are signs of a counterfeit product.
    * Packaging – If a certain luxury brand packages their shoes in a logo box or with a dust bag and these items are not included with your purchase, your shoes are fake. Also be sure to look for flimsy, poor quality or different size packaging.
    * Holograms – Many brands are incorporating the use of holograms on their labels. Do some research to find out if the shoes you are trying to purchase normally come with a hologram. If you don’t see one, it’s a fake.
    * Price Cuts – If the shoe you are trying to purchase retails for $1,000 and it’s on sale for $200, it’s a fake. Discounts like these do not exist with luxury goods. If the price sounds too good to be true, it probably is.

Of the course, none of this is news to the long-time readers of the Manolo, for the Manolo has been crusading against the fakes and the off-knocks for many, many years.

And now, for your viewing pleasure, the video of the fake Christian Louboutin shoes being destroyed by the front loader…

Most satisfying indeed!

Denis Multistrap Sandals from Christian Louboutin for the Monday

Manolo says, it is Monday and you are back at your desk six pounds fatter, several hundred dollars poorer, and heavily bruised about the head and the shoulders.

When did Thanksgiving, originally the simple feast of gratitude for the blessings of Divine Providence, become the PigBaconTurDuckenator of holidays, the portmanteau weekend into which we have stuffed the giant helium balloons, the professional footballing, and the nakedly opportunistic, four-day celebration of retail commerce?

Black Friday… it sounds like the curse, and is.

Of the course, these curmudgeonly thoughts occurred to you at 3:26 in the AM, on the Friday morning, as you were standing, number 41 in the line, waiting to enter the BestBuy store at 5AM to purchase the greatly discounted video game console.

Normally, you would seek to avoid such needless trauma.

But, unlike crafty Odysseus, you cannot fill the ears of your oarsmen with beeswax and lash yourself to the mast. And so when the Sirens of Commerce sing to you their sweet, sweet song, you grab the helm and drive your holiday budget onto the rocks of Scylla (as represented by the parking lot of the Galleria).

And to mix the Greekish metaphors, when the doors of the mall were opened, you rushed in, and were seized by the spirit of battle. You became as prideful Achilles at the gates of Troy.

Sing oh muses, of how your mighty handbag cut the swath of destruction, through Forever 21!

And, now, here it is Monday, and you are feeling the aftereffects of gluttony and hand-to-hand combat, the combination of heavy bruising, too-tight clothing, and the profound regret.

Look! Shoes!

Christian Louboutin Denis Multistrap Sandals

The Denis Multistrap Sandals from Christian Louboutin. Prizes that even scornful Agamemnon would dare not take from your hands.

Three Cheers for the Red, White and Blue!

Manolo says, in America is is the Election Day, and so, let us give the three cheers for the Red, the White and the Blue!

Sigerson Morrison Fold Over Boot

Christian Louboutin Tsar Platform Pump
Mulberry Postmans Lock Ankle Boot

And now, allow the Manolo to gently remind you, if you are the American, to do you civic duty.

Six Years of Shoeblogging: Shoes With Which to Overawe the Natives

N.B. In honor of the Manolo’s six years of shoeblogging, the Manolo has decided to repost this week some of his favorite pieces.

This post, in which the Manolo responds to the inquiry from one of his dearest internet friends, first appeared on March 13th, 2007

Manolo says, one of the Manolo’s dear internet friends has asked him the question.

Querido Manolo,

I have just received an invitation to present a paper in Helsinki this summer at a conference on the laws of war. This means that I shall be the only twenty-something-year-old female in a hall full of big, gruff, snarly, manlymen. Since genetic constitution and chromosomal make-up render it impossible for me to project an image of gruff, snarly, girlitude, I prefer to present myself as both a lover and a fighter. Could you please recommend a pair of show-stopping shoes that would convey this image?

Further considerations:
(1) Price and heel altitude are distant seconds to superfantasticness.
(2) I think it’s time for me to buy my first Manolos.

If you decide to post this query, could you please leave my name out? Muchisimas gracias!

With warmest wishes from frosty NYC,

Manolo says, mucho-macho, snarly, gruffy-huffy, law-of-war manly men? In Finland?

Oy, to the Manolo this does not sound like fun. Indeed, it sounds as if the Manolo’s nameless friend is riding out to the annual Mongol Golden Horde company picnic, featuring all the roast badger and curdled mares’ milk you can eat, followed by the spirited game of “Kick the Head”.

In this case, she should do as the Manolo does when forced to participate in the strange native rites, behave as if you were the eccentric 19th century British explorer.

Be polite, be friendly, be sympathetic, but make it clear to the cannibalistic savages, through your dress and your comportment, that you represent the superior culture, one which offers these benighted souls the benefits of indoor plumbing and the afternoon tea.

Thus, when the lawyers of war offer you the drink of honeyed mead in the polished skull of their slain-in-battle senior partner, you must sip politely, and smilingly promise them, in your best Queen’s English, that you will return soon with the Royal Navy gunboat and destroy their God-forsaken way of life.

Of the course, in the meantime, the Manolo’s friend must dress in the manner that shows them that she is the powerful and important person in her own culture, one who must not be trifled with (or, at the least, one who must not be cut up and tossed into the bubbling cauldron of lunch.)

What better way to do this than with the aggressively beautiful shoes?

Here are two classic pairs of the Maestro Manolo Blahnik’s shoes that one should not live without.

Carolyne by Manolo Blahnik   Manolo Loves!  CLICK!Carolyne by Manolo Blahnik   Manolo Likes!  Click!

Either in the mid-heel or the high-heel, in the dark brown or the black, these shoes are serious enough for the everyday work, and yet, kick-ass enough to quell the native insurrection.

If one truly wishes to leave the savages speachless, however, then the Manolo suggests these slightly less practical pumps from the Christian Louboutain.

Louboutin Metallic Python Pumps

Metallic python?

Expected reaction: “Ooooooh, shiny! Lawyer Grog think pretty lady in glittery snake shoes have mighty mojo. Must listen attentively to presentation.”

Christian Louboutin Simple Ankle Boot for the Wednesday

Christian Louboutin Simple Ankle Boot

Manolo says, after all of the buckles and straps and glittery glam-o-tchotkes, it is pleasant to see more tranquil, classically elegant shoes, such as this Simple Ankle Boot from Christian Louboutin.

Pique Prive Patent Pumps from Christian Louboutin for the Monday

Manolo says, it is Monday and you are back at your desk doing that thing that you do for that money that you need.

Normally, this would be the cause of mild discomfort and soul-weariness, as who would not prefer to be away from grindstone?

However, given how roastingly hot it is out of the doors, you do not mind being in the air conditioning during these most Doggish Days of Summer. And, even the better, your boss, along with two or three of the office troublemakers, are away on their vacations, allowing all of the remaining worker mice to play, or at the least to somewhat chillax.

And so, you will spend much of the morning locked in conversation with your cubemate/frenemy Dina, whom you like/dislike in that way peculiarly reserved for the co-workers.

“Did you see what Snooki was wearing yesterday,” begins Dina’s conversational gambit. (She is obsessed with the reality shows.)

“I don’t watch that,” you lie, trying to maintain your image of aloof intellectualism.

“Oh, don’t fib. I saw you friending the Situation last week.”

“It was not the Situation,” you fib, “it was Jonathan Safran Foer.”

“Honey, Jonathan Safran Foer’s pectoral muscles do not look like that.”

And so it goes, exhaustingly inconsequential tittle-tattle conversations about minor celebrities and their doings. It is almost enough to make you wish for the untimely return of your boss-lady…almost.

Look! Beautiful shoes from Christian Louboutin.

Pique Prive Patent Leather Pumps from Christian Louboutin

The Pique Prive Patent Leather Pumps from Christian Louboutin are more than enough to remind you that, in general, life can be pretty good.

Interview With the Curator

Manolo says, the Manolo’s friends at the Collector’s Weekly (which earlier this year published the remarkable interview with the shoe collector John Walford) have returned with the excellent interview with Elizabeth Semmelhack, one of the curators at the magnificent Bata Shoe Museum and author of the book Heights of Fashion: A History of the Elevated Shoe.

There is much in this interview to both ponder and enjoy, but below are two intriguing excerpts.

Collectors Weekly: How did a pair of Manolos or Louboutins become star accessories?

Semmelhack: I don’t think that it was the designers themselves who did it as much as the culture. Clearly their shoes are lovely, but over the course of the 20th century, you have a great loss of accessories in women’s wear. I like to use the hat as an example of that. If you think about watching “I Love Lucy” on TV, so often she’s walking by a hat shop and she stops to purchase a hat. Now she’s got to hide it from Ricky because God forbid he sees it. It’s the hat that she must have, the hat, the hat, the hat. Along the same lines, we had white gloves and we had pearls and we had other similar ways of expressing status.

With the loss of iconic accessories like those, shoes carry a greater burden of meaning. We now require shoes to really, as someone said, punctuate our fashionable outfit or unfashionable outfit, whatever we’re doing. They are increasingly a way of turning a generic outfit around, and I think that’s one of the reasons why shoes have become such a focal point of culture. We can read a lot into them.

But today, where fashion has been so democratized, you can have two women of wildly different socioeconomic standings or wildly different social constructs of themselves going into the same, say, Gap store and buying the exact same pair of jeans. One might wear her jeans with a pair of Manolo Blahniks, making one statement, while the other woman puts on a pair of Keds to go watch her kids play soccer, and she makes a different statement.

The loss of the hat as the fashion accessory elevates the shoes to the place of prominence? The theory is so simple and elegant, it cannot but be true.

Here is the second excerpt, this time on the topic of clothing for the men.
(more…)

Christian Louboutin Fernando Sandals For the Tuesday

Manolo says, it is Tuesday, and you are back at your desk, the glorious summer of 2010 proceeding without you. But, not to worry, you have had the sufficient dosage of summer over this past holiday weekend to hold you for many days to come.

It was not the undercooked hot dogs, nor the overripe potato salad, but the near drowning incident that perhaps has soured you on the entire Fun In The Sun™ enterprise.

But the less said of that, the better.

All you choose to remember is the image of your husband pulling your teenaged son back into the boat by the hair, slapping him on the back as he coughed up water, and saying, “that was fun, wasn’t it?”

And your son, your lovely, sweet boy, not only agreed to this maniacal proposition of fun-ness (fun-hood, fun-osity?) , not only agreed, but wanted to get back on the inner-tube as soon as possible.

“This time,” he said, spitting up the algae, “I think I can get more air if you go a little faster, Dad.”

Aaaarrrrrregggggghh!

And then you remember, it is after the Day of Memorialization, you can wear the white shoes!

Christian Louboutin Fernando Patent Leather Sandals

Celebrate the season with Christian Louboutin Fernando Patent Leather Sandals!

Christian Louboutin Ronfifi Corset Boots For the Monday

Manolo says, it is Monday and you are happy to report that your Mother’s Day was not unpleasant.

Your children took time out from their very busy schedule of digital communication to present you with the bouquet of flowers and the card, and to accompany you to the brunch at that Italian place you like. What was truly sweet, however, was that during your celebratory brunch, they had the great good courtesy to keep their cellphones in their laps. It was so wonderful! Whenever you looked down the table you could even pretend they were praying, their heads bowed, their thumbs furiously working at perhaps their rosaries.

Less satisfying, was the appearance of your mother-in-law, Blanche, and her “old man” Jimmy, who were also present at the meal.

Blanche is the wonderful mother-in-law, the sort who is sensible enough to help when needed, but also sensible enough to keep out of your business when not. However, what is troubling, is that she appears to have dealt with widowhood by joining the motorcycle gang.

“They’re not a motorcycle gang,” answers Gary when you mentioned your fears to him last night

“Yeah, but what about his beard?,” you snap back, “and those awful biker outfits?”

“Jimmy’s alright. The dude looks like Santa Claus.”

“I’m not sure. He seems a little rough to me.” The image of two, stout, elderly people in matching red leather jackets and chaps, eating eggs benedict, still lingers.

“He’s a retired endocrinologist,” says Gary, “They ride a Honda Goldwing for criminy’s sake.”

But you are not placated. You are worried for Blanche’s safety, and perhaps more than the little bit jealous that she seems to be having so much fun on the other side of seventy, heading off to Big Sur while you are still chained to your desk.

What is needed now are boots!

Christian Louboutin Ronfifi Corset Boot

Look! It is the Christian Louboutin Ronfifi Corset Boots!

The exact sort of boots you would wear on the back of the giant motorcycle being piloted down the scenic coastal highway by Gary, except in this fantasy, Gary looks exactly like the young Lorenzo Lamas.